Asklemmy

Different people have different ways of trying to appear non-threatening. If I am ever behind a woman, I just start running behind them in a friendly chase fashion just to break the ice and make them realize that I am just a goofy harmless guy. Usually, they play along and run as well.

Not just with women. I usually drag my feet to make some noise when coming from behind. Most times I’m walking faster than other people so I constantly have to overtake them but don’t want to surprise anyone.

Women specifically I try to avoid passing directly, if it’s not too inconvenient or I will look in another direction, on my phone or whatever to make it clear I’m not interested in them.

But if a creep approaches her, I do make sure to stand nearby and be openly aware.

I hate that women need to be so afraid.

Personally I just walk up behind them, cover their eyes with my hands and yell "guess who?"

But to each their own

I often "accidentally" drag my feet a little bit to make my footsteps are a little bit more audible.

I'm usually a very quiet walker, so I just want to make sure my presence is known, as opposed to startling people.

Yes.

I'm 6'5" and broad but the number of jump scares I cause is ludicrous. Most people (especially women) seem to have no situational awareness to the point where they miss gorillas approaching them.

If it's a stranger then I'll try to announce my approach from further away. If it's someone I know I'll see how high I can make them jump.

Edit: just saw you label some of these people creeps. They're not. This is a massive green light that they don't want to accidentally scare you.

I go for walks for exercise. Sometimes I encounter lone women in the woods etc and I'll try and take another route to avoid walking behind them. I feel like announcing by whistling etc would just make things worse. It annoys me that we have to think about these things tbh. I'm gay for fucks sakes, ive got zero interest in women. Im just out and about minding my own damn business.

Not humming, but I do make noise intentionally. I'm a big guy and understand that I could be threatening to women in the wrong circumstance. I also walk fairly quietly just as a matter of the way I walk; so, I've scared folks on more than one occasion by "sneaking" up on them unintentionally. So, if I think I am doing that, I'll land a few footfalls hard and flat to make my foot slap the ground and alert the person of my presence before I get too close. I also try to give space to strangers while walking. Things like moving to the other side of the sidewalk/street, slowing down or speeding up to pass. Basically, trying to not look like I'm stalking them.

I'll clear my throat, jingle my keys, make louder footsteps to make my presence known, especially at night or when turning a corner. It's not just for women, but for any person or animal to not be startled.

I think it's a combination of courtesy, habit from having worked in a restaurant kitchen, and camping in bear country.

Yes, the fear is typically that we don't want to be accused of following you, sneaking up on you, or being creepy, so there is usually some noise or overt thing we do to try to imply we are just minding our own business.

Sometimes to avoid the situation all together, (let's say I am walking home at night and I see some woman walking the same direction ahead of me, and I know I am going to end up passing her because my pace is faster), then we will literally cross the street just so that we don't have to be put in the awkward situation of walking up to and past you at 3 am on a public sidewalk.

There are other things beyond this as well that men do or avoid doing which women might not realize. Most men in my experience are really careful to never be left alone with children for example. No one blinks an eye if a woman is, but men have learned to avoid potential false accusations in this way as well.

A lot of men are fearful to do something as simple as taking their kids to the park because of this. You can search for articles in which fathers who take their own kids to the park have been accused of being pedophiles just for sitting on a bench while their children play, or accused of kidnapping just because they are an adult man with a child in public. You won't find any articles about this happening with a woman.

I took a different approach, I put my keys on a carabiner so I jingle when I walk. It makes it really hard to accidentally startle people.

Humming seems a bit odd. I wonder if those people are just humming to themselves.

I'll do things like scuffing my feet, jingling my keys, or pretending to talk on my phone. I am a large guy and I naturally walk very quietly. I have scared quite a few women, and honestly, it is unpleasant for both of us.

If I'm in an elevator alone with a woman or something I will usually just give a friendly nod and adopt a very relaxed posture, like leaning against the wall. The youtuber Contrapoints talked about this exact scenario in one of her videos (a black man whistling in the elevator so she wouldn't feel scared) and it made me more aware of it.

Yes.

I started doing that when I was walking back to my dorm in college. It was winter, night fell early, and I didn't notice someone 10' ahead of me heading the same way. They got freaked out by the guy following them.

It turned out to be someone who also lived in my dorm, so I "followed" them most of the way home before I realized the issue and called out to them.

We ended up talking for a bit, and I said I'm sorry for scaring them, but the biggest issue was I seemed to come out of nowhere, so when they freaked out they thought I was some creep like, waiting to jump someone.

So yeah, I make noise, for others comfort. I don't even think about it anymore, it's just automatic.

The person I followed wasn't even a woman, he just thought I was gonna mug him, but if I can freak out a 6'2" guy I could freak out anyone by accident.

I'm physically quite large, but most people will outrun me for medical reasons, but you can't tell just by looking at me. It wasn't until #metoo that I considered what it might be like to walk on the street and be afraid for your safety all the time.

My partner shared a few historic experiences which made me want to throw up.

I've read the responses here so far and I've done similar things for the same reasons, noise, humming, nodding, etc.. I'll also cross the road if I think my presence might make someone feel uncomfortable, or if I feel uncomfortable.

I have also walked off a footpath onto the verge to give the person coming towards me, space to move.

I'd be interested to hear what that feels like for people who are experiencing this kind of interaction.

I'll 'walk heavy' in stores or stairwells whenever there is a blind corner

Kind of the same reason you make noise while hiking in an area with bears. I'm never looking for an interaction so I make some one-off noises to let the other party know I'm there and I'm letting them decide how they want to handle that info.

As someone who gets mistaken for a man: Yes. I clear my throat, shuffle my feet, make some kind of noise. If it's a headphone wearer, I'm either going to slow down to make space or give them a wide berth if it can't be avoided.

Yeah same, I make noise to be less “I’m being sneaky” because I’m not trying to be. It never occurred to me this could be taken as “I’m trying to start a conversation, while not being in your field of view at all and also not saying any words.” I don’t do this when walking with my wife.

I have to do it just walking around the house. If I'm not in the room for a minute and suddenly appear my wife gets scared. I'm not intentionally quiet, but I walk gently most of the time. I've joked that I need to get a bell around my neck.

If I'm walking around its likely I'll be having a conversation with myself in my head which eventually ends up with me absent mindedly speaking to myself out loud so if I see someone in public I immediately try to shut myself up lest they think I'm truly mental.

I mostly use my dog as a way to introduce that I am near and mean no harm to anyone not expecting someone following the same path (mostly rather long streched bike&pedestrian roads with no exit but with park benches and geen patches for dogs and so on).

Simply by saying "Dogs Name, are you coming sweety?".

Announces that I am nearby with a doggy and by no means any poser that wants to appear scary.

At dark day times I mostly have a flashlight with me to shine on my dog and whatever she is currently sniffing (or sneakingly trying to eat...). Which has the sideeffect of her being better visible to others. (She's a bigger dog with black fur - so some people would be scared of her anyhow. Especially in the dark if there is a barely visible big dog. Which is why I hope to make people not that uncomfortable by speaking softly and shining light on her. (And of couse because bicicle riders need to be able to see her, to not run her over))

I've done similar things. I'll clear my throat or something if it seems like someone hasn't noticed my presence.

One time I was out walking someplace and a woman was walking about 20 feet in front of me. I just took out my phone and called my wife and rather loudly announced where I was walking to, asked her about her day etc. The woman visible seemed to relax.

Yes! Another one is 'the sniff'.
There's been so many times when I walk past somebody and they do that weird outward sniff thing, like they want me to know they're there.

That must be a sign of the times.
That has never crossed my mind.

I personally do this, especially now that I live in a rural area and enjoy taking night walks. If I encounter someone, but particularly a woman, I make some noise and slowly move away so they’re not caught off guard if they see me around doing my own stuff. In the city, I also move to the other side of the road and walk faster to give people space. Part of this behavior is influenced by my OCD and ADHD.

I certainly don't. I just act like they don't exist and mind my own business unless they make some effort to engage with me. I'm built like a goblin though so I don't think I'm particularly scary to most people.

Nope but I sing and whistle when im alone walking my dog. Maybe if I have headphones and im going along with the song. Nothing to do with proximity of womenfolk though.

I do try to make some sort of noise, or i will shift what i am holding to what ever side i am passing a woman, or will cross the street to avoid having to cross paths… mainly because accusatory stares, or women clutching their children as i pass is too hard to bear

I try to do something to make my presence known because the number of times I've frightened a woman by, from her perspective, appearing out of nowhere, is quite high. I'm a pretty quiet walker too.

I also make extra space on the sidewalk or I'll cross the street at night when I'm overtaking less than 3-4 in a group.