this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2025
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Dad Jokes

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Don't do that

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[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Too late, already invited all my friends over for supper.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But how will you feed all these people with only one loaf of bread???

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's cool, he has a fish too!

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Dude, he knows I'm recovering, I brought water for a reason!

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Hey guys, don't say anything, ok? I'm gonna switch his drink out later and really fuck with him!

[–] ZagamTheVile@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Jesus is up on the cross, dying slowly. He sees Peter nearby, weeping. "Peter, my friend, come close. I have something tell you...." "Peter, come closer, i am weak and I must say this to you...." "Peter, my beloved friend and follower, the time is close for me to leave and you must hear this, come to me and hear my words...." "Peter, i can see your house from up here".

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Anyone besides me ever think Jesus was the original bdsm sub? He was literally nailed to a cross by his hands and feet.

Doesn't get more hardcore than that!!!

You know.....if religion and all it's stories weren't total bullshit and fictional.

[–] merde@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

many people were "literally nailed to a cross by their hands and feet"

Crucifixion is a method of capital punishment in which the condemned is tied or nailed to a large wooden cross, beam or stake and left to hang until eventual death. It was used as a punishment by the Persians, Carthaginians, and Romans, among others.

[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Interesting read, thanks for posting

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I mean, I don't find it hard to believe that some dude started a cult and then his followers kept exaggerating his stories for years after he was dead.

[–] merde@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

are you writing about Brian?

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago

Could be lol

[–] Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 week ago

Kick over tables and whip people?

[–] Illogicalbit@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

I’ll do anything for love…

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago