this post was submitted on 16 May 2024
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[–] Fiivemacs@lemmy.ca 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Super confusing question..

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

Don't think too hard on this one, Padre.

[–] vk6flab@lemmy.radio 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Jourei@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Oh yeah, some BBQ and just snicker every now and then, hoping he'll get the pun at some point.

[–] Stern@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago

I'd get Joseph a "The dad that stepped up" mug.

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 14 points 1 year ago

A large wooden cross, every year, for eternity

[–] iawia 13 points 1 year ago
[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 1 year ago

Get yourself something nice that also looks good on the Holy Ghost and you'll all love it.

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 11 points 1 year ago

Man, I hate shopping for myself...

[–] wjrii@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Whatever I wanted that week.

#justtrinitythings

[–] OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 year ago

Nothing because he hasn't shown up for anything. He won't even show up to prove his own existence. He's an absent parent.

[–] cmgvd3lw@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 1 year ago

a wife that don't cheat.

[–] ieatpwns@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Steak and a blowjob

[–] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

A performance in his honor sounds best. Other things seem either rather worldly for him or too difficult such as restoring Constantinople.

[–] Drummyralf@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

The door of the castle church of Wittenberg with Luther's 95 theses nailed on them.

[–] stinerman@midwest.social 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] iiGxC@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 year ago

But like one of those pornstar custom ones of the virgin mary

[–] LunarLoony@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 1 year ago

A bobblehead, probably

[–] RadicalEagle@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I'd probably commission some art of Shadow the Hedgehog on a motorcycle holding a gun. The license plate on the motorcycle would say "ALL0FM3". I feel like he'd appreciate that.

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 1 year ago

So, masturbation?

[–] Tippon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago

Definitely not Roman wine. Last time we drank that, I got hammered!

[–] spacemanspiffy@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

You know that diamond encrusted shit from Roger on American Dad? That. I think God would probably lime one of those.

[–] Atin@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

A book on ethics

[–] MyDogLovesMe@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago

Same thing as every year.

A day at the house by himself! No wife. No kids.

[–] Yareckt@lemmynsfw.com 1 points 1 year ago

A serious answer would probably be working another day on bringing paradise to earth. I think that's what jesus' purpose is.

[–] jjlinux@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

More saved souls. That's all He wants.

[–] ParabolicMotion@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago

One of these. Tell him to wrap it around the polar ice caps, with the reflective side facing the sun, before it’s too late.