vent
my partner just had a breakdown in public about getting her period and being dysphoric+embarassed about it as she had nothing to cover herself with, i offered to call with her as i wasnt with her, she agreed and i was trying to be empathic and get her out of that but idk god it fucking felt like i had fuck all empathy tbh i was trying and i do have empathy it just i dont know i feel broken i was worried out of my mind and i kinda didnt know how to react and my partner told me to shut the fuck up cause it doesnt help and it feels like i dont give a shit and i was like fuck; idk through a phone it's so hard to convey emotion and meaning to words, instead of that I sounded like I was dismissing her, I majorly fucked up I wish I knew how to handle people better instead of proceeding like I did right now
really feeling useless and asking what the fuck is wrong with me for proceeding like this, I should have had things to say and calm someone down than 'yea' and 'im sorry' and platitudes but I felt useless being so far away, fuck and I kinda locked up cause usually when I comfort anyone it's irl not over a call ahhh fuck
vent
am I really like this checked out dissociated husk so much I cant even help someone close to me? What the fuck is wrong with me, genuienly. My god. Fuck.