this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
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Spoiler

The 22-year-old Trump has running Homeland Security terrorism unit is no Doogie Howser, expert says

One year ago, Thomas Fugate was graduating college.

Now, the 22-year-old former Heritage Foundation intern works for the Department of Homeland Security overseeing the prevention of hate-fueled terrorist attacks.

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[–] take_five_moments@hexbear.net 27 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I've never been punched in the face.

edit: oh wrong answers only my fault

[–] Lyudmila@hexbear.net 23 points 3 days ago

Executive Order 429367 issued today requires all official government photos to be taken with the DreamWorks Face.

Hot off the tails of the RealID law entering effect, all Americans will be required to renew passports and driver's licenses for the second time this year, with a hard deadline of November 3, 2025.

[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 19 points 3 days ago

"Clearly, you don't own an air fryer"

[–] mayo_cider@hexbear.net 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

WikiHow: 12 steps to look smart but dangerous in a school photo

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

How to Look Smart but Dangerous would be a great title for a comedy.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago

Temu Doctor Evil

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago

He's staring into the mirror. Again. Damn it. My official portrait is happening tomorrow. I gotta get the eyebrow raise just right. "What do I expect you to do? I expect you to die, Mr. Bond."

[–] LanyrdSkynrd@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

Trademark infringement

[–] Des@hexbear.net 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

that is the most 42 year old looking 22 year old i have ever seen

[–] thagoat@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Wanna have a peak at my anime collection?

[–] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

"The name's Jayson, but people call me 'shit for brains'."

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

when your custom character is in the cutscenes

[–] john_brown@hexbear.net 10 points 3 days ago

Day 673: straining for twenty minutes daily still has not produced a real mustache

[–] dannoffs@hexbear.net 11 points 3 days ago

I call this look blue steel

[–] buh@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago

Big Balls’ cousin Small Balls

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 10 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Looks like he's waiting for his Brumaire

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Looks simultaneously 15 and 48 years old.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's so weird how that malady affects so many male right-wingers. They have a real life Balok vibe.

He's from "The Corbomite Maneuver" episode of Star Trek TOS. Clint Howard (Ron Howard's brother) played him but an adult actor did the voice.

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 1 points 2 days ago

I think it's really just a matter of having a younger person styled up like a 60-something. Which is something fash gravitates to for obvious reasons.

The comb on homie's hair here makes the slight hairline recession more pronounced. The mustn't-stache shouldn't be there. The facial expression is causing massive brow lines and other things that just kinda look like wrinkles instead.

And who knows how the photographer is handling the lighting which can do a lootttt of things.

It's like they tried so so so so so hard and all they did was ignore any good aesthetic choice or strength they coulda leaned into.

[–] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 8 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

The world's first Mustn'tache

[–] huf@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

cosmo lavish after he's done a few hours with the eyebrow-raising machine

[–] Utter_Karate@hexbear.net 7 points 3 days ago

And who has a better story than Bran the Broken?

Working on his Milei-ass sideburns and failing

the other ball will drop any day now and then i can finally grow a goatee

[–] boiledfrog@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

Potato in chief

[–] tombruzzo@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago

When mom comes in telling you to stop gaming because dinners ready but you just got Play Of The Game and u a gangsta

[–] largerfather@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

do i make you horny baby?

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

dollar store Rufio

[–] WIIHAPPYFEW@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Fuck uhhh some kinda doogiehowser or smth I think

checks spoiler

godDAMMIT- oh wait WRONG answers. Nvm yay what prize do I get :)

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

The stache explains the weird shit I'm into

milei vibes

[–] HarryLime@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

Dreamworks face

[–] NinaPasadena@hexbear.net 2 points 3 days ago

Cognitohazard: look at this photo to go into a murderous rage

[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 2 points 3 days ago

Helloo! I was the president in 2004’s Metal Wolf Chaos. Helloo! From Software protagonist right here!

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 1 points 3 days ago

Why yes, both heads are bigger than average.