Ok so what is the most obvious, unhide-able , agonizing, and debilitating disease he can get from this?
Because I hope he gets 330 million cases of it.
this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
727 points (98.8% liked)
Not The Onion
16205 readers
2101 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Necrotizing fasciitis
Man I would feel so good getting to laugh at that.
It would be a guilt free belly kinda laugh that actually makes me feel better.
Knowing how much pain he was feeling and how miserable he is would literally make my stress level go down.
O... Ok! The situation in taking care of itself.
I wonder why he says we should fortify our immune system if he doesn't think germs cause diseases? Like, what is the immune system doing making cells that can eat bacteria?
Like most con men, RFK is using people's ignorance of what odds mean. If the chance of getting sick from swimming in that water is only say one percent, he knows the odds are extremely good that he won't individually get sick, and then he will palm this off as "evidence" that it's all a big fuss over nothing. The park service might know maybe 100,000 people will swim in that water this season, so they'll probably save about a thousand from getting sick by closing the place. Even if somebody who does get sick manages to get the attention of a news outlet, they can be scoffed at as an anomaly. "How do you even know the water was responsible? Where else have you been? You're just looking for attention!"
This is how dumbasses are going to kill us all. “I grew up drinking milk straight from the cow and never got sick! Big government just wants to prevent you from unlocking the magic of drinking pus!”
They won't kill us all, just the ones dumb enough to believe reverting to the pre-science era to reinforce political beliefs is a good idea.
Our best chance is that he gets one of these diseases that is effectively treatable with a vaccine.
Thing is, even with that, he'd just take the vaccine and proceed to lie about it for profit. His father must be turning over in his grave.
Vaccines are for prevention, they don't work as treatment.
Yeah, that's true.
But I think we both know that if he caught something he'd still get it treated privately and lie about it publicly, lest his grift be endangered, but I'd love it if he got polio and had to try and keep it quiet.
Some vaccines actually can work as an effective treatment!
How can the onion ever hope to compete with reality
the onion can not keep up with this, because fiction has to be believable, unlike reality ;-)
load more comments
(1 replies)
I hope he gets sick and suffers
Maybe we can convince him to drink some of it
I think I know how a lot of people are thinking right about now. lol
He's just a straight up secret nurgle cultists, that was showing his devotion and flouting it
Encourage this behavior?
Cooking your chicken is gay and will give your children drag queens or something.
That if anything's gonna kill these motherfuckers, it's most likely to be hubris that finally does it?
I've said all along that these people will ultimately be done in by their own virtuosic incompetence.
Managing an operation as complex and huge as the US Government by traitors, incompetents, narcissists, Nazis, drunks, addicts, weirdos, propagandists, and criminals is not sustainable. They will eventually burn their own house down, and we should surround the fire, and when one of them tries to escape, we should catch them, and toss them right back in.
go go power Darwin!
With modern medicine, we have switched to survival of the richest.
Funny enough not even Steve Jobs level money can save you if you prefer alternative treatments over modern medicine. Of course despite your stupidity you end up stealing a liver that actually someone else deserves more because you are stinking rich but even that does not prevent the inevitable.
Money won't do shit for you if you're too delusional to believe in modern medicine lol
Usually the people in charge of regimes like this are often sadistic hypocrites and absolutely know that what they spout is bullshit. RFK jr. here on the other hand, is apparently actually a fucking idiot.
Stop calling everyone a "skeptic" and call them what they are: deniers. Anti-science, fact resistant deniers. Calling people germ-theory skeptics, or climate skeptics, or vaccine skeptics, and so on and so on, makes it sound like there's an honest scientific debate going on
Exactly. Skepticism is about casting doubt on beliefs and dogmas, not outright rejecting facts. When it comes to germs and vaccines there's scientific consensus on those matters. They're as close to facts as you can get. But rejecting those you're not a skeptic, you're a denier. There's no scientific debate on those topics, only a political debate on whether to reject science or not.
load more comments
(4 replies)
load more comments
(8 replies)
Wow this is next level stupid, i really thought it was the onion. I'd say i'm even shocked at this demonstration of stupidity, but the fact his grand children are led into this is beyond sad.
What else can you expect from a guy that starved a brain worm to death.
I love that we're literally going back in time. They thought we'd have flying cars and end world hunger, but instead we have to watch our politicians swim in shit water.
Edit: HE TOOK HIS GRANDCHILDREN!?
The fact that people have any thought that this guy is smart or a good person makes me hate humanity.
What a shitty grandpa.
That man deserves dysentery
Wtf did i just read? The US health secretary swimming in shit water???????
I get sometimes going “I’ll roll the dice”
- Me: I’d like my steak medium rare
- Government: That could expose you to some health risks because it’s not cooked well done.
- Me: Yep, I’d rather enjoy a medium rare steak and take my chances.
What the fuck was the logic on this one though?!
- RFK: I want to swim in sewage
- Government: it’s a bad idea to swim in sewage
- RFK: I LOVE SEWAGE!!!
- Government: you are a Kennedy right? You all dont have a pool?
- RFK: worm in brain need poop, poop in water, yum yum poop
load more comments
(16 replies)
Steve-O can't compete with this man
Steve was admittedly stuffed to the gills with booze and every drug available, and still is somehow more reasonable than this clown
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(2 replies)
view more: next ›