what is the charge?? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal??
this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2025
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I see that you know your judo well.
HANDS OFF MY PENIS
The way he delivered that line was Oscar worthy.
Truly, every line in the clip is delivered with the bravado and conviction of an experienced thespian.
"Gentlemen, this is democrrracy manifest!"
This is the bloke that got me on the penis befoaaa.
"Ooh, that's a nice headlock sir! Ahhh, yes, I see that you know your judo well."
"And you sir! Are you waiting to recieve my limp penis?"
This interview was three years ago. I sincerely hope he is in good health and has many more succulent meals in his future.
Unfortunately he's passed away.
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Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, do these sound like the actions of a man who had all he could eat?
Ah shit I fumbled the quote
Maintain eye contact, eat the card. Let them know you want to make a scene.
GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY PENIS
"You got any more of these tasty notes? I haven't had all I can eat."
Does this sound like a man who had all he could eat?!
And what happened after you were asked to leave?
We pretty much went straight home.
Mrs Simpson, let me remind you, you are under oath.
We drove around all night looking for another all you can eat fish buffet.
And when you couldn’t find one…?
We went fishing.
Does this sound like a man who had all he could eat?
Lionel Hutz was a great character. RIP Phil Hartman.
RIP Phil
Fuck Andy Dick
What is the crime? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?
This. Is. Democracy. Manifest!
Ahh yes, I see you know your Judo well... Good one.
Does this look like a man who had… ALL he could eat?
"Sir, that is all you can eat for $15.99"
I just wanna be called "sir" without it being followed by "you're making a scene."
Jeez how much did you eat
A number of places have a time limit. It's all you can eat in 3 hours. There can be rules that you have to eat what you take, and when you take entire plates but barely touch them, the restaurant gets a bit annoyed.
I've been in a few as well After 30 minutes I'm usually full out staying a 3 hour time limit and still eating......
There's a buffet place my spouse's friends were all gaga over. It was a bit of a drive so it took me a few years to actually agree to go. It was like $25 or $30 a person (but free if it's your birthday!) 15 years ago, so it's not like it was cheap. The first thing that struck me is how absolutely cavernous the place was. Like a Walmart filled with tables and food islands. Signs saying where to find certain types of food. That kind of thing.
I might have eaten $10 worth of food. And I have been known to pig out from time to time. But between the mediocre at best food and the "atmosphere"... yeah I had no plans on sticking around to try and get my money's worth.
In the UK we have “JRC Global Buffet” which is almost exactly what you describe. It’s…not great. I went because, like you, some friends were particularly enamoured with the place for some reason.
I wasn’t a fan.
In the US we used to have one called Sizzler. I don’t think they were as expensive as what parent comment is talking about. They kind of made a comeback but not sure if they still do the buffet. It was great when I was a kid in the 80s. Not sure if I’d like it now though. Certainly not for $30, you can get a nice meal at a nice restaurant for that.
Also awesome username btw.
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This note is a parody of an actual note that was about drinking in a bar.
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I aspire to be like Dilbert's father and just live in a an all-you-can-eat buffet because if I never leave, I can eat forever.
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My mother was 100 lbs soaking wet, but MAN could she eat. There was a steamed shrimp buffet on the other side of the city.
Family rules: We were there for shrimp, if you a little salad that's ok, but stay away from the bread and the desserts, you can get those anywhere. You'd best eat at least three plates full
We'd eat and eat and eat and eat, then take a little break, then eat some more. Mom was skinny; dad was normal-sized, and I was a little chubby. OMG did we put away some shrimp.
Easy, just put a wig on and keep eating.
Wait until they're not looking to put on the wig. Otherwise it's kinda a bit weird.
Assert your dominance, put the wig on while maintaining eye contact with the owner
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We used to go to the buffet after practice. My teammates and I would be so hungry we could do three or four plates. We'd usually get there around 4, and while we were there they'd transition from lunch to dinner, which had different food and was more expensive, but we'd paid for lunch.
It was technically allowed, but because we were doing it consistently, and just eating so much, the manager came up to our table to have a talk with us about it. Didn't tell us to stop, but just tried to shame us. He said "I know what you're doing". We weren't doing it on purpose, we just came in hungry when practice ended.
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Democracy manifest!
Take the card with you make copies and dump them around the entrance to the restaurant. Do this for a while. Don't get caught. Its littering ya know.
I heard they shaved a gorilla.
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