it is truly one of the great injustices of the world that bears are so deadly and yet so incredibly adorable
this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2023
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chapotraphouse
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No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
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if not friend, why friend shaped?
Fact: wolves were apex predators
Fact: humans domesticated wolves
Fact: bears are apex predators
Goal: humans should domesticate bears
Fact: moose are apex predators
Goal: humans must avoid being bit by moose
We'll all be fine as long as we avoid that horrible room with a moose
forbidden doggie
mlem
I don’t call myself an apex predator, I’m sweet guy who frolicks.
Everyone ELSE calls me the Apex Predator. 🧸 
don't make fun, that's just how you get peanut butter off the roof of your mouth
It's a clever adaptation to compete with the only species that can challenge them for the title, homo sapiens. Like how angler fish have that little light to bring unsuspecting fish closer, bears have irresistible fuzzy ears and silly tongues. 
hug me with your large, non-retractable claws
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeX81REIoC4
This guy has black bears that visit his porch. They trust him enough to bring their cubs around. I want this as much as I want a group of raccoons that I feed glizzies to.
What are glizzies?
As a vegan I would rather humans be like hippos - herbivores you really don't want to fuck with
hurr hurr I'm a burr