this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2024
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chapotraphouse
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sources report the first navy seal was climbing into a row boat, when his zipper caught on a cleated line, squeezed his balls, and after 5 years of Evangelical Christian NoFap he busted instantly and fell into the water. the other bozo jumped in after him, but instead of landing next to him, he landed directly on top of him and their heads clunked like coconuts.
no longer wrapped in tactical floaties and carrying the weight of 12 days worth of chef boyardee ravioli MREs, they sank instantaneously never to be seen again.