Fired from my job a few months ago, did manage to get a temp gig but that runs out in Nov and job prospects are non-existent. So I'll lose my home and likely have to live with my parents as a 30 year old. Not a single friend I can hangout with IRL. No one I can talk to. No SO, dating app fatigue. No real motivation to even try anymore. And within the last few days I've come to question my sexuality. I've come to accept I'm not really as attracted to cis women like I used to be and have an interest in trans girls but fear that just makes me a chaser so idk wtf to do about that. Honestly haven't been this low since I got involuntarily hospitalized after getting addicted to benzos in my early 20s.

It's not as bad as it could be but looking at the future I can only see it getting worse and that's what gets me.

[–] dil@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Woof. Yeah that's tough :/ I'm sorry you're feeling so low. Congrats on the temp gig though!

have to live with my parents as a 30 year old

Is this mostly a pride thing, or are your parents bad people?

No one I can talk to

Fear not! You have access to dozens, maybe even HUNDREDS of terminally online communists!

No real motivation to even try anymore

Burnout is the devil. I hope you can recharge

within the last few days I've come to question my sexuality

Exciting!!! That does seem like a challenging situation re: not being a chaser, and honestly idk the answer. The fact that you're worried about being one is a good sign, though! Maybe ask here how to respectfully date trans women?

My (cishet) opinion is that you should try it out if you're able. As long as it's between consenting adults, there's no "wrong" sexuality, and never questioning the default is lame.

I can only see it getting worse and that's what gets me

Yeah... that'd get me too. By "it" do you mean your specific situation, or things in general?

If it's the former, at least you have a whole new world of sexuality to explore!

If it's the latter, I've made a couple posts about my optimism, but I understand the call of doomerism.

[–] Nopeace@hexbear.net 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My parents are great but loving with them is a major ego & self confidence hit. Plus no one wants to date a nearly 31 year old living with his parents. Makes intimacy very difficult. & "It" is referring to my situation specifically but the state of the world certainly does not help.

I really appreciate the kind words though. Truly. Thank you so much

[–] dil@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago

No problem! I hope that you're able to find a job and can keep your house, but it's nice that you have your parents to fall back on if it doesn't work out.

Fwiw, I've given up on dating and it's been very good for my mental health. I was spending a lot of time trying to find an SO, but lately I've been putting that time into hobbies instead and have been much happier. If I bump into someone, I'm open to dating, but that's not the goal (or the desire, even. Dating is a lot of work)

Obviously, that may not be an option for you, but something to consider.

Best of luck!