I'm European and I'll fight you if you say this is made up.

Fucking Door Salesmen

ITT: people who start screaming because they don't realise the # at the start of a line has special meaning, and turns it into a heading.

It's not a war crime, it was a warning bomb.

Fucking genocidal assholes

The edit to make "Surely" bold is the icing on the cake.

but hollywood movies make it seem like people still inevitably sleep in the bed naked anyway

As is customary, Hollywood is lying to you. You don't fuck and be merry and fall asleep. The ladies usually go pee afterwards (helps for everyone to prevent uti) and with creampies a shower after is basically essential.

Replacing the sheets depends on how dirty they got, but it can usually wait till next morning. Sex is pretty exhausting and we are all a little lazy.

Well, Israel is already committing genocide, so any means really.

Nuking a capital is just signing the death warrant for your nation.

When I say 'choo choo' you say '[unstoppable sobbing]'

choo choo

Soon that will be 'to ever have gorrilaed'.

^(source)

Four packs of Paracetamol will fuck up your liver beyond repair. Downing a blisterpack in one go can already kill you, let alone four.

Yes, yes they do