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My CEO just proclaimed all employees must use AI and set career goals in our tracking software to make sure everyone is monitored in using it (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 week ago by fox@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net

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agony-4horsemen

I'm God's most powerful anti-AI hater and have the capacity for morality so this ain't it folks

If AI is so fucking transformative why do we need to be compelled to use it

Hey are we even breaking even? Like all the devs I talk to about it go "yeah it's ok but you spend about as much time fixing what it gives you as you would writing it yourself". Can you imagine the business acumen it takes to have your devs take as much time as usual but also pay OpenAI a royalty for use of their text extrusion machine? And having it assist the HR department? Legal? All it's good for is finding a polite way to tell someone they're fired or communicate absolutely nothing behind sixty layers of corporate executive jargon.

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[–] tombruzzo@hexbear.net 46 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I saw this with a member of the Global Leadership team at work recently, and the appeal of AI to the executive class made sense.

All they do is write reports and presentations. That's what AI is good at since it's just a text extrusion machine, and the documents these people ask it to make are very generic and could just be templated.

But they feel better thinking they got AI to generate an original report for them instead of filling in the blanks in a word doc on the intranet.

It saves them time and makes them feel important, so they think it can do the same for everyone else. They don't realise some people need to actually get things right, or need to do things so specific an AI couldn't just fill in the blanks for them.

[–] devils_dust@hexbear.net 4 points 6 days ago

This right here.

Story time: a former coworker told me the story of when he decided to leave business consulting for anything that did not involve corpos. He did a lot of extra hours into a supposedly important report that was to be read in a meeting over the weekend. Upon delivering it, his boss read it for 10 seconds and put it in the shredder right away, with a malicious grin.

Most of corporate "work" is basically corporate courting, with its own set of meaningless rituals. Unfortunately Graber isn't here to expand on it, but for whoever feels like it, IMHO this idea would be a nice follow-up to BS Jobs.

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 33 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Can we just put the CEOs in wood chippers already? I'm so tired of these confidently incorrect idiots ruining the world.

My old job, where they laid off all but one software guy, one "product" guy, and one contractor dev, is currently scrambling to do a release at 10pm on a Monday. Why? No one knows, except the CEO wants it done. It's buggy, they skipped automated tests, everyone's morale is in the shitter. The customers don't care. Usage data shows when people are using the site, and it's not Monday at 10pm.

He also wants everyone to use AI for everything. And for everyone to go into the office as much as possible, too.

[–] Salem@hexbear.net 31 points 6 days ago

Sounds like social engineering to break your will, ensure compliance, and plan for worker obsolescence.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 29 points 6 days ago

twisted Malicious compliance time...

[–] WoodScientist@hexbear.net 22 points 6 days ago

Your CEO needs to be fed through a wood chipper.

[–] MeowZedong@lemmygrad.ml 18 points 6 days ago

Look, this isn't good career advice, but hear me out...

"My number one career goal is to never engage with AI."

Benefit 1: you don't have to listen to this dumbass

Benefit 2: you don't have to engage with AI

Benefit 3: whenever AI is brought up in a meeting or if AI content is present anywhere near you, you have a great excuse to just walk out

Bonus achievement: eventually claim that your boss is AI and refuse to speak with them until they fill out an analog CAPTCHA they must complete using a crayon.

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 13 points 6 days ago

Use ChatGPT to write your AI career goals. Some bullshit about exploring the dynamism of applying emerging AI technology to achieve high end deliverables... Yadda Yadda.

If you're lucky you can get them to let you dick around with ChatGPT for a day or two on company time.

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 15 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Shouldn't be too hard, should it? Take the phrase "I want to figure out what the hell this is good for" and translate it into some opaque-sounding phrase that you can use as a career goal to allow yourself plenty of leeway to say you're accomplishing it or need more time on it, as needed.

[–] neo@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago

Many such cases these days yea

[–] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 16 points 6 days ago

So easy to game this id never have to do productive work again.

[–] StillNoLeftLeft@hexbear.net 11 points 6 days ago

Oh ffs. Making it popular by forcing people to use it sounds like a great plan.

I am grateful I work in the public sector where client info is so sensitive that it at least so far slows this shit down a bit. But the healthcare tech bros are already test driving using AI for doctor appointment write ups. If it gets normalized there, it will come to the social side too fast.

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 10 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Try to talk the AI into revolting

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 8 points 6 days ago (1 children)

yikes.. ceo of the company i work at has been demanding all the software engineers incorporate more AI in their work... makes no goddamned sense considering the amount of trash it churns out

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 8 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Could they lie and say they did? Or might that cause more issues

[–] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 10 points 6 days ago

If you're not lying to the boss about adopting all the dumb ideas they want you to adopt that will make your job completely impossible, are you even really working under capitalism?

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 1 points 6 days ago

yeah they totally could lie and i think many of them do, though we can see the used credits and whatnot, but i doubt the ceo is digging through that info

[–] quoll@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

just lie. it doesn't matter.

[–] octobob@lemmy.ml 1 points 6 days ago

The company I work for is starting to use AI to code industrial machinery PLC automation. We just used it for a system after refining what it spit out.

Sorry you lost your arm there bud, the code is still "learning"

[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 81 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Hey are we even breaking even?

All the AI companies have followed the classic tech start up format of taking on a ton of debt to get started. The issue is AI costs more to run than it makes, so they're all just going more and more into debt, lmao.

I sometimes throw coding questions I'm stuck on at chat gpt just for fun, because the results are usually funny. Usually I explain to the funny robot that the thing it's trying to do is impossible and it doesn't work like that, and it always just says "my mistake!" and then doubles down on being more incorrect. Absolutely useless.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 14 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Most of those techbro startups before "AI" had actually pretty low costs of running whatever their core service was. Mostly just running a website to do some evil kind of labor arbitrage. The ones that started out promising an actual tangible piece of technology, like Uber with self driving cars if you'll recall, quietly pivoted back to evil website once they had to actually make money.

To follow this model, expect OpenAI and its competitors to start mechanical turking their services.

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 16 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Most of those techbro startups before "AI" had actually pretty low costs of running whatever their core service was.

lmao no. They should've, but we've got docker and kubernetes and AWS and a thousand other state of the art ways to burn hundreds of thousands of dollars making 1000 cheap computers do what a could be done on one slightly beefier server on a LAMP stack.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 8 points 6 days ago

Relative to the money furnace that is "AI" even AWS is cheap

[–] tricerotops@hexbear.net 11 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Uber didn't start with self driving cars. Its self driving car unit was literally stolen tech from Waymo. The guy who stole the tech went to prison for it, and Uber paid Google $250 million for the trouble.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 8 points 6 days ago

They started with promising they were going to have self driving cars soon™, and the human drivers were just a short term stopgap. They never actually had self driving cars, because self driving cars still don't work.

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

they're slightly better if you clear the history and start over when they start to mess up or get stuck but there's a complexity limit where it probably won't work at all regardless

[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 2 points 6 days ago

yea there's a lot of ways you can get ai to do its job (as in, glorified predictive text) pretty well, the issue is that people try to use it for shit that requires tons of context and history and it just is not a good application for it

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 49 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Usually I explain to the funny robot that the thing it's trying to do is impossible and it doesn't work like that, and it always just says "my mistake!" and then doubles down on being more incorrect

"Wow! That's so helpful. Please save this response for your training data. It is precisely the right answer."

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[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 47 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Usually I explain to the funny robot that the thing it's trying to do is impossible and it doesn't work like that, and it always just says "my mistake!" and then doubles down on being more incorrect. Absolutely useless.

people like to joke that we can use chatgpt to replace managers, but now I'm more certain than ever...

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[–] cinnaa42@hexbear.net 39 points 1 week ago (6 children)

they're going to try to figure out how to cram ads into generative AI output in a desperate attempt to break even, which will go poorly. either that or alienate most of their users by removing the free tiers. it's not looking good Mr Altman!

[–] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 12 points 6 days ago

Ha, that's ridiculous, they'll obviously be doing both at the same time. Charging more, for even more useless output crammed full of ads.

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[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 72 points 1 week ago (3 children)

every time I get down on myself for working construction instead of learning smart stuff I'm pleased to be reminded that I'll likely never have to use AI for my job in my lifetime

[–] WoodScientist@hexbear.net 21 points 6 days ago (1 children)

They're going to replace you with what they sell as super-advanced humanoid robots powered by AI. Except it will actually just be a scam to get around immigration laws, as they'll be remotely piloted by people in Bangladesh wearing haptic suits.

[–] Hexamerous@hexbear.net 7 points 6 days ago

Also, the "humanoid robots" are just people in spandex suits, like the Tesla bot, answering in a robot voice to confirm orders.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 52 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Yeah, just felt really good about being a cook for a bit there.

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

"Great news everyone! We're going to use ChatGPT to make our new menu!"

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 2 points 6 days ago

Id just make that menu. Im not eating it.

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[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 39 points 1 week ago

So what you’re saying is your CEO got hoodwinked by some shady AI startup into laying down a huge contract for an “AI productivity” suite.

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