this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] HelluvaKick@lemmy.world 5 points 4 hours ago

Worked in vending for years. You ain't gonna profit off one machine in most cases. Unless you are in a prime location, buying 10 different cases of chips and then trying to sell the 750 or so bags before they expire requires several machines.

[–] Saledovil@sh.itjust.works 23 points 10 hours ago

It's not really passive income, though. You have to get people in there and interview them. Even if you just spend 10 minutes per applicant, that's already 600 minutes, or 10 hours. So yes, this is a decent hourly wage, at least until word gets around about what you're doing, which it will, because what kind of job interview is done in 10 minutes? Not one where you actually have a chance.

And yes, I do realize this post is most likely a joke. Still fun to reply to, though.

[–] MrShankles@reddthat.com 20 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (1 children)

So about $10 a drink minimum? (assuming $300/day gross income)

If they can find 30 people per day to pay those prices, they need to quit their job and go full time into vending machine sales. They have a gift

[–] oo1@lemmings.world 1 points 8 hours ago

Or just become a bartender.

[–] TempermentalAnomaly@lemmy.world 54 points 14 hours ago (3 children)

Everyone. Calm down... This is a joke account.

Here another one of his posts.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 5 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I don’t know how people take shitposts seriously. Do we have way too many literal thinkers on Lemmy?

I think it's a testament to on the nose satire and hitting at the heart of people's anxieties about work.

[–] MrShankles@reddthat.com 7 points 11 hours ago (2 children)

You calm down, this person's tapped a market of people willing to pay $10+ per drink from a vending machine! I wanna know their secret, cause I'm switching careers if I can pull ~$78k annually from a single machine

[–] TempermentalAnomaly@lemmy.world 4 points 10 hours ago

Listen up! AI's gonna be a game changer. If you don't master passive prompting kids your vending machines good bye. Buy my book, "Passive Prompting"!

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 2 points 10 hours ago

The secret is to make awful doughnuts with da bomb spiked filling and offer them a compliment doughnut when they arrive. Water is $3, soda is $4, and milk/soy milk is $5.

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 7 points 14 hours ago (3 children)

Coca-Cola owns the machines, btw.

[–] cyrano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 13 hours ago

Guess who own Coca Cola —-> Passive Income /s

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Guess who owns a key for the machine?!

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 2 points 4 hours ago

Unless you have an older machine, probably the Coke guy.

Coke wants to control what drinks are in the machine and what percentage of the take Coke gets, so they refill the machines.

We used to have an older machine on an old contract, and since we didn't really care about the income from it we let Coke swap it for a new one they'd service.

About 2 months later, they said we weren't selling enough drinks and took the new machine away.

[–] tipicaldik@lemmy.world 3 points 13 hours ago

I used to run an auto service center with a Coke machine in the waiting room. Once a month I would get a commission check in the mail from Coca-Cola for usually about $50 or $60. We averaged about 40 cars a day through that place so the machine got a lot of business...

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 14 points 13 hours ago

putting the "ass" in passive!

[–] Snowclone@lemmy.world 23 points 15 hours ago

That's not passive... 60 interviews a day?

[–] Zwrt@lemmy.sdf.org 70 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

Am I confused on why people are overcomplicating the math and adding assumptions to a clear given.

  • 60 applications a day.

  • Half of them (30) buy something.

  • Makes 300 per day.

  • They must make $10 per vending customer.

We can safely ignore operating costs and sementics to conclude this is massive ragebait.

[–] udon@lemmy.world 11 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Agree with the ragebait, but (theoretically) they might interview more than one person at a time. He talks about 50-60 interviews a day, so with that seat layout, we have a max of 8*60=480 interviewees (assuming the interviewer is also sitting). That would be 240 drinks per day.

But it's going to be quite busy. Let's say he works 12 hours = 5 interviews/hour = 12 minutes per interview = 1.5 minutes per interviewee. That is not accounting for the time everyone needs to settle in and sit down/get up and out again; the time for him to casually get people to use their very limited time to buy a drink instead of being interviewed somehow (?) Also not accounting for the work involved in inviting and scheduling people, refilling the machine, costs of drinks, office space etc. And the soul draining work of funneling 480 people per day through a stupid fake interview, repeat the same thing every 12 minutes, just to get them to buy a drink instead of doing something useful.

What a nightmare. In this scenario, he is really the person to feel bad for. Imagine a life like that 😅

And apart from that: The more logical setup would be to turn off the air condition in the waiting area and put the vending machine there.

[–] MrShankles@reddthat.com 2 points 10 hours ago

Add complimentary saltines in the waiting room, and they might increase profit margins slightly

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 23 points 17 hours ago

Put out a bowl of extra salty peanuts and crank up the heat. Open a small bar in the corner serving margaritas, mojitos, pina coladas, etc... Sit back and watch the passive income roll in.

[–] Confidant6198@lemmy.ml 7 points 15 hours ago

This is a capitalistic nightmare, just getting people on interviews to give them false hope just to make money from them. This is a scam.

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 21 points 19 hours ago (10 children)

That’s not passive income. That’s a lot of work.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 6 points 14 hours ago (2 children)
[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 11 hours ago

Nobody wants to work anymore

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 2 points 12 hours ago

How dare you so accurately clock me from one post.

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[–] falidorn@lemmy.world 209 points 1 day ago (4 children)
[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 71 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Now hire someone to do the interviews, then it's passive income.

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[–] IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 45 points 22 hours ago (3 children)

Warning⛔: comment section filled with haters trying to keep a player down 😤

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[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 44 points 22 hours ago (3 children)

That's not "Passive" income, if you have to attract 50-60 people per day, pretend to interview them, while subliminally encouraging them to use the vending machine. That's called a full-time job, and probably illegal, too.

And that isn't $300/day profit, he has to pay for those items in his machine. The profit is probably no more than 50%, so $150/day. For an 8 hour day, that's $18.75 an hour. That's a lot of work for not that much money. It certainly isn't "Passive."

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[–] WrenFeathers@lemmy.world 24 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (4 children)

This is TOTALY real and in no way, designed to infuriate people dumb enough to believe it.

For the record:

A soda vending machine's revenue varies significantly based on location and product pricing, but a rough estimate for average daily revenue is $5. Monthly, this could range from $150 to $1,500, with high-traffic locations potentially earning up to $100 per day. However, profit margins depend on product costs and operating expenses.”

And that’s if he owns it outright.

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[–] some_designer_dude@lemmy.world 85 points 1 day ago (5 children)
[–] officermike@lemmy.world 112 points 1 day ago (4 children)

More unbelievable is the implication that the average applicant spends $5-6 in the vending machine

[–] TheReanuKeeves@lemmy.world 37 points 1 day ago

Sir, this is the internet. Noone would lie about something like that here.

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[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 56 points 1 day ago (2 children)

$37.50 an hour to talk to a minimum of 6 strangers that want something from me and think I can deliver it for them?

I’d rather be an urban outdoorsman.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 2 points 10 hours ago

Urban outdoorsman.

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[–] slowmorella@discuss.tchncs.de 25 points 23 hours ago (3 children)

sure... 9-8 min per job interview including welcoming the candidate, smalltalk, talking about the bullshit role you have to offer, listening to the candidates speech about why they are the best match for the bullshit role, asking critical questions about hypothetical job situations, pressing the candidate to buy a pyramid-scheme soda, saying goodbyes and escorting the candidate out.

sure that sounds realistic

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[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 11 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago)

Keep chasing it, buddy.

I can't tell if this is satire or linkedin lunatics, and that's the joy of lemmy shitpost.

[–] leftthegroup@lemmings.world 14 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

The math doesn't math.

Even assuming the drinks cost $3, even if all 60 bought one, that's $180, not 2 or 3 hunnid.

And that's not counting the work to do the interviews, as mentioned by others, or counting the work to do inventory and stick the machine, it even the cost of the drinks themselves.

Bro really doin all this work for what accounts to maybe $30 profit on a good day. Which would be ok for a tiny amount of work, but even if he does this at his regular job, is just a decent chunk extra, not a ton.

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 20 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

It’s almost as if this was in fact a shitpost

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[–] VitoRobles@lemmy.today 36 points 1 day ago

This has Nathan Fielder energy and it's great

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