ADHD

Hey there, sorry to hear about what you are going through. I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age, it has gone untreated but that's another story. In my adult life I've dealt with anxiety and depression. I've recently been diagnosed with bipolar.

My daughter (20ish) had a very similar outlook as you. She was confident she had ADHD and wanted a diagnosis. But similar to you her psychiatrist wanted to focus on anxiety and depression. She pushed back against this and didn't make progress.

But recently she went through a severe depressive phase and sought help. Instead of seeking help to get a specific diagnosis she went in simply asking for help.

You could try going to a psychologist and saying I'm feeling x, y, and z and they are impacting my life in a, b, and c ways. Then let the expert guide you through what you need.

I'm not saying this is you, but my daughter was convinced she needed to be treated for ADHD. But she really needed to be treated for her depression first.

Separate from all that a word of caution from someone who is prescribed a controlled substance. If you come in strong asking for an ADHD diagnosis you might be flagged for drug seeking behavior. It's better to present what you are feeling and let the docs try and figure out what works.

Best of luck to you, life isn't fun when it feels like your brain is out of control.

Hey, that is a good vent, when you do a good vent people see it and say "damn I have been through/am going through/will go through that" and there is an inherent kindness to making that not a solitary feeling experience for everyone else so thank you!

If you are worried about your ADHD evaluation I get it, people around me all the time try to get me to really trust the healthcare system around me and I just can't, at every point of contact with the US healthcare system it is demonstrated that not only does the US healthcare system not understand WHY ADHD destroys my quality of life, it is actually quite violently uninterested in it to the point that the only people I am ever allowed to talk to are people without any power (on purpose) to change the things that are hurting me about the healthcare they are offering.

I would recommend focusing on how hard ADHD has made your life, but not in terms of where you have gotten. Every time you notice the doctor start to look at your credentials and go in their head "well they seem really distraught but that is a good college and not an easy job so they must be exaggerating to me" smack them back to reality with a description of how much brutal stress and anxiety ADHD brings to your daily life that you can't just sweep under the rug or meditate out of because it has to do with necessary basic life tasks.

I have to tell you as I have to tell myself every day people really DO NOT FUCKING GET how unbelievably hard you have to try to do things you can't get yourself to do. People will not only NEVER understand you for that, they may become so intimidated by your strength and power from realizing you are constantly doing that in the background seemingly "effortlessly" that they will want to destroy and crush you out of pure fear instinct. An equally large group of healthcare providers will simply never be able to grapple with how much their ignorance has hurt ADHD people they have spent far too much time extracting pride out of believing they were helping and it is easier now for their story to destroy you than start a new chapter that grapples with all of the already written chapters.

The stupidness and inanity of being invisible with ADHD because healthcare providers listen to the words you say and then look back down at their instructions after nodding and letting the words pass through their mind like wrapped gift presents not to be overly examined or memorized.. will drive you up a wall and also it may eventually kill you when healthcare providers begin to identify a more simple narrative that fits their worldview about why you won't do the thing you are supposed to.

Yeah, this is war, act accordingly...

It's so dystopian in the states. When I needed Ritalin I spoke to my GP, they referred me to a psych. Did three sessions and then the psych called my doc and asked him to write a script.

$2700??

Cant you just find a psychologist and schedule an appointment for a lot less than $2700? Like $250?

This might be cost prohibitive but it also could be helpful to miss your first appointment so it takes a few months to rebook and there's an established data point that helps you in terms of setting expectations.

Telling you out of my personal experience: It's not worth seeking professional help. I started helping myself. I did the opposite of what physicians, psychologists and psychiatrists told me, and I'm feeling much better now. I started understanding how I function. I started working on myself and I readjusted my priorities. I learned to stop caring about all unnecessary responsibilities. And now I accept myself the way I always have been - not how people tell me to do.

People always judge me. It's this ubiquitous fear and my true weakness. I learned to let go. Be the weird guy. But it's all fine to me now.

Next step I'm working on: stop forcing myself to burnout at work. I don't need to accomplish all my goals for the day. I have more time for them than I would expect. It's better in the long run.

I don't need the stimulants which the doctor wants to prescribe me. I've been highly functioning because of my fears, but I decided to stop relying on them constantly. The time for a more relaxed life has started now.

A mom I met said Omega supplements worked for her son. I believe you can get prescription versions that are more potent than random supplement. There are some studies that Omega can be lacking in ADHD brain.

Also some newer studies finding electrically quiet areas in ADHD brain, and when stimulated with an electrode pacemaker device gave ADHD suffered the focus they struggled with, so maybe hope is coming.

As a aide note Ritalin helped a friend and a family member with ADHD.