this post was submitted on 15 Jun 2025
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And I keep saying yes, but I'm running out of room on my finger for the rings.

Update: I asked him more firmly about it and he revealed that it was a scheme. He says we're now married 14 times, or as he put it, "14 layers deep into marriage" (a quattro-decima marriage) and if I ever left him I'd have to divorce him 14 times for 14 different reasons to leave him and get out of all the marriages. I'm looking up if this is legal but can't find anything saying two people can have 14 separate marriages with each other.

I do love him 14 times more than the average marriage but I'm worried for his self esteem if he thinks he needs to do this to discourage me from leaving him.

Update2: I got kinda' mad at him and he proposed again, likely to distract me, and I couldn't say no. So 15 layers deep now.

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[–] buh@hexbear.net 32 points 3 days ago (1 children)

those extra marriages aren't valid unless the parliamentarian approves

[–] AntifaSuperWombat@hexbear.net 23 points 3 days ago (1 children)

And until that happens Juan Guaido will act as interim husband.

[–] Guamer@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago

Juan Husbando

[–] Finger@hexbear.net 21 points 3 days ago

no more half measures walter

[–] corvidenjoyer@hexbear.net 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Getting platonically married 32 times...

As a bit.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 23 points 3 days ago

getting married 255 times as a byte

[–] PaulSmackage@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

My wife walked up to a clown statue and said "i do". I laughed and asked "what was that about?" She replied, "that wasn't the first time". I got got.

[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That's a pretty good spouse ribbing

[–] PaulSmackage@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

We tease eachother constantly in ways like that. Our longest ongoing bit is trying to find sneaky ways to call eachother italians.

[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I have Italian heritage. I always thought that bit was funny

I'm a pudgy white straight millennial with colonizer heritage. Hexbears worst nightmare!

[–] PaulSmackage@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago

I'm First Nations and she's from Mexico. We gotta get really creative.

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 17 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Are you a banana phone by any chance?

[–] BanSwitch2Buyers@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I am not, but I have the banana bodyshape.

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Darn, I don't know of anything else that's ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring.

[–] AntifaSuperWombat@hexbear.net 15 points 3 days ago

This little guy is all about the rings and dings crazy-frog-trans

[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 1 points 2 days ago

So my sister had a baby almost a year ago and apparently he loves the song Baby Beluga. Well, I collect records and I thought it would be cute to get her a nice copy of Raffi: Baby Beluga to hang on his wall.

For some reason you can't get one for less than like $60 and insane shipping! Is Raffi like the secret underground pink band that released 20 copies of their album on vinyl and then hid them in trees around town for people to find?

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 14 points 3 days ago

Divorce him two or three times as a threat. Just enough to keep him in line.

[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I say get married in every state! Some states have really strict divorce laws. Nothing shows commitment like 50 layers deep on marriage. Plus, you can do your honeymoon at the same time

[–] BanSwitch2Buyers@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 1 points 2 days ago

I always wanted to get Vegas married. Like an axe murderer themed wedding with an Elvis as the preacher. It's not legally binding unless you mail the paperwork in, so you could just go home and frame it.

I'm actually married, so I would maybe just send in the paperwork for the hell of it

[–] LoveWitch@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

If you get married more than 99 times then it resets back to 0.

Careful. Bro has discovered the loophole.

[–] DelgadoSlims@hexbear.net 1 points 3 days ago

That's cute, but it doesn't count unless you have 14 rings