this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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[–] daw@feddit.org 10 points 6 days ago
[–] Etterra@discuss.online 5 points 6 days ago
[–] shininghero@pawb.social 50 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Oh nooo, I'll have pass time by...
Read the ingredients on the shampoo bottle!

THE HORROR!!! THE SODIUM LAURETH SULFATE INFUSED HORROR!!!

[–] StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works 20 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

That's the old school phone, if you were lucky your mom bought some magazines and now you can read about how to best plant your herb garden before spring, it's fall btw

Reader's digest. My parents kept them in the bathroom.

[–] stupe@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That's why I keep a book by the toilet.

[–] Eyedust@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 6 days ago

I have one of the old Ripley's Believe It or Not books by mine. It's wild how many things in there that amazed people back in the day aren't really that amazing or unbelievable anymore. The internet has made the world a pretty jaded place.

[–] auraithx@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)

On average, it takes most mammals, including humans, about 12 seconds to have a bowel movement.

Why tf are you having to pass time?

[–] xylol@leminal.space 3 points 1 week ago

To pass log

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago

I guess I'm above average!

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 28 points 1 week ago

That's called "raw dogging". Am I using it right?

[–] nebulaone@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago (3 children)

It goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes

I miss them so much

[–] PaulBunyan@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago

Bought this LP for $30 in 2012. Greatest investment I’ve ever made.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Hope you got a bottle of Dr. Bronners in there.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

Moral ABCs never disappoint.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 1 week ago

I kind of miss the magazine that only gets read in the bathroom.

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago

Nothing is more haunting than the sound of introspection while pooping.

[–] kindenough@kbin.earth 6 points 1 week ago

Why? I am done in five seconds. Must be all the olive oil. Takes longer to wipe…

[–] morgunkorn@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 week ago

back in my days, i read the label at the back of the shampoo bottle or the descaling cleaning spray

[–] kruhmaster@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago

Bathroom Reader made a fortune off of this idea.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Plan b: Can you still reach the bottle of shampoo?

[–] fungalfelidae5@lemm.ee 2 points 1 week ago

i love reading random shampoo bottles

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

that's why i keep two books in the bathroom. True Facts That Sound Like Bullshit by Shane Carley, and Brief Answers to Big Questions by Stephen Hawking. Perfect for reading ~10-20min at a time

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

People who use their phone on the toilet are gross to me. I put in wireless earbuds and listen to a podcast. Preferably one without ads so I don’t have to touch them until after I’ve washed my hands.

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Non-dominant hand has entered the game.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's even worse when I go in prepared. I have young kids who will barge in and take my device while I'm on the throne. Now I've got to start taking in 2 devices so I still have something after losing one.

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Bathrooms have privacy locks, not security locks. They can be opened from the outside if someone tries, and my kids have little fingers that can open the latch from outside without any additional equipment.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 week ago

Then add a security lock you can close from the inside.

Hang it at the top of the door so it can't be used by children.

Or just discipline your children to not barge into occupied bathrooms.

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

You have that at home? We just have a normal door with a normal lock.

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago

The pure luxury!

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