Man. It took about 3 years with my ex from the point she told me that she didn’t love me anymore for it to die off completely. That took me meeting someone else. She lost her mind when that happened. It was like she just wanted to go wild for a while and she expected me to just be there and forgive her when she was done. She spent some time in the hospital, ended up settling down with the last dude she cheated with.

Life is a fucked up, evil bitch too. My ex spent over a decade with me. We were best friends for years before we ended up together. We split, she gets diagnosed with cancer a year later and dies a miserable death.

Life is too short to spend your time where you know you shouldn’t be, but we should also consider every decision we make as though we could die tomorrow, because we could.

I don’t know. I’ve been having a hard time today thinking about everything that happened to her. Sometimes it’s for me, sometimes it’s for her, some days it’s for both of us.

I love my wife, the woman I’m with now. She and I are so great together and I’m very lucky to have found her. I’m not saying I regret anything. Still, trauma is trauma and what has happened has happened and it’s going to affect me for however long I’m on this planet.

Good luck to you. I hope you end up in a happy place some day.

I kinda wish my situation was just a divorce lol, it would be less complicated. I'm poly and about a year ago my polycyle imploded, I found a partner I adore, then my spouse was like I want to marry someone else so we got that ball rolling, my new partner broke up with me, but we still enjoyed each other's company and our leases were up at the same time so we had a feelings talk and were like fuck it let's do the queer thing and move in together. Everyone knows I'm wildly in love with them but I don't make any moves or anything I just sit with it and cherish the friendship best I can, trying not to think about it too hard

The last bit of my marriage was difficult though the lead up to moving away from each other. If you ever want to talk about stuff I just went through all that maybe I can help, or just be an understanding stranger to talk at. Let me know

God damn that'd just be a nightmare, to the point of probably literal seizures for me. Best of wishes to you in your future endeavors.

People say it's better to have loved and lost, but tbh I have never had a mental breakdown over being single / not meeting someone.

You'd like to think so, but I've heard some stories about what folks at the senior living center get up to. It's only "uninterrupted couch time" in the JD Vance sense.