this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] tenchiken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 80 points 11 months ago (2 children)

"your hot wife obviously is suffering from sexy demons. I need to use my specialized equipment to vigorously purge them from her, once each evening, and sometimes just after lunch..."

[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 61 points 11 months ago (3 children)

That sounds far fetched until you remember that they diagnosed women with hysteria and treated them by giving them orgasms. When the vibrator was invented to treat muscle pain much later, doctors latched onto them for treating hysteria to give their hands a break.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 43 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Absolutely. Hystéra is Greek for uterus. Hysteria, or the “roaming uteri” theory was a successor to Plato’s theory of hysterical suffocation. They believed that the uterus could migrate around the body, placing pressure on internal organs. It’s like gynecological fan fiction.

[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 23 points 11 months ago

When pregnant that's a pretty good explanation of what it does though. Uterus just tells everybody up to the diaphragm to get outta the fucking way.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Duh. Uterus is Latin. Thanks. I’ll edit for clarity.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I had to look it up myself lol

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

I couldn’t remember the spelling of the Greek word, so I looked it up yesterday for that comment. I searched “Greek word for uterus” and then wrote Latin in the comment like a dingus.

Not only was Plato Greek, but Latin words that end in “us” are pluralized with an “i.” It was all right there mocking me. Lol

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Wasn't at all mocking! It wasn't even me who caught it. My GF was like "Hmmm, thats too internet-only-fact" and looked it up. Just passing it along cause I sure as shit didn't know lol

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

No worries! I didn’t take it as such. I meant the comment itself was mocking me. I knew better.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Oh, yeah, that feeling sure is fun... especially when it catches a hyperfixation wave.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Have you been talking to my therapist? Lol

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

No we just gone so crazy that you don't even remember I'm you buddy! Try and remember on Wednesday, it's embarrassing when we don't check the mirror on our way out the door, can't have that happening again.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Not after that Hoffstadtler presentation mishap, no.

You’re fun. I hope you and your girlfriend have a great weekend!

Lol thanks! I feel the same. Enjoy what's left of your weekend too!

[–] Dadifer@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

I think that makes up for a lot of bad things that were done.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I think you responded to the wrong comment

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Is your username a modem interpretation of OMGWTFBBQ?

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[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago (4 children)

that still exists today in Turkey

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 4 points 11 months ago

Well in that case

Merhaba, bugün doktorunuz olacağım. Lütfen eteğinizi kaldırın, iç çamaşırınızı çıkarın ve her zamanki pozisyonu alın.

[–] boatsnhos931@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Gobble gobble

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[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 44 points 11 months ago

The only logical solution is for me to blow pipe tobacco smoke in your butthole.

[–] DudeImMacGyver@sh.itjust.works 39 points 11 months ago (2 children)

"You got hysteria lady, time for a finger blasting session."

[–] mrgreyeyes 9 points 11 months ago (3 children)

They used a vibrator because they did not want to get tired.

[–] DudeImMacGyver@sh.itjust.works 5 points 11 months ago
[–] modus@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I've never heard that term for an intern.

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[–] MTK@lemmy.world 26 points 11 months ago

Lol, you can still do that, just call it "the truth that big pharma doesn't want you to know"

[–] sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Credit to John Mulaney for this joke

[–] Decoy321@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

This joke has been around a lot longer than he has.

Also, this image is a knockoff of a decade old meme, but made worse by adding a lot more words.

Edit: the older version

[–] sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Decoy321@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You are quite welcome!

(I'm helping! Yaaaaaay!)

Edit: Found the old version, just to provide actual help.

[–] variants@possumpat.io 13 points 11 months ago

Sadly you could still do this today and charge insurance in the US as long as people don't care you're charging their insurance.

[–] snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago

Not to leave out covering your forehead in leeches to suck out evil.

[–] Theharpyeagle@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Something about the phrasing "you should do a lot of cocaine about it" really tickles me. I wonder what you call breaking grammar rules for humor like that.

[–] Crikeste@lemm.ee 1 points 11 months ago

You’ve piqued my interest and now I want to know, too!

[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 9 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You've got a horrible infection and a fever?

I'll be right over to slit your veins and let all the bad blood out.

(In fairness I think bloodletting was mostly out of practice by the time actual telephones existed, but lol joke)

Maybe a more time period accurate one would be:

Your foot hurts? You think its from a badly fit shoe. Ok. Ok. Come over tomorrow and we will stick your foot into the wildly overpowered and unshielded x ray scope and we'll see what can be done.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Sadly (or not), they werent making shit up, they actually believed what they said

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Yep. Thats a demographic that has gotten a whole lot more exposure lately

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There is a ghoti swimming in your veins

[–] LoreleiSankTheShip@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago

Do you have a ghoti-ing licence for that joke? Wild ghoti must be preserved, you know!

[–] lemmy_nightmare@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 months ago

Let’s not forget, keeping your ear to an ample bosom “listening” for heart sounds.

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