this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2025
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
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I finally got around to seeing "I Saw The TV Glow", and it definitely lived up to the hype.
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i understand that. not trying to sound cynical at all but personally i feel like a lot of that stuff gets amplified online because baby transes who have just shattered their whole perception of self feel they need some sort of pre-made coherent identity to cling to. which is valid and all but i think moving on from it at some point is desirable. way less of a pronounced phenomenon irl in my experience. being your own person is fine and good actually.
yeah I have a problem with this rn (identity crisis 24/7) XD I'm trying but it feels like I'm staring from 10th floor through a glass pane observing others and learning their behaviors through a miopic lens
solidarity comrade, i've been there too. i'm autistic and i relate to your analogy for sure. nothing wrong with taking bits that you think are good and beautiful from other people, that's a lot of what the self is i think.
spoiler
yeah but i feel so stuck on a personal level, feels like I'm not going anywhere, wish I could just swap my whole identity but mmm...; at the same time I have a lot of impostor syndrome and I would like my 'self' to be original which bothers me a lot day to day cause I feel like an empty shell with no interests other than observing and learning from othersI struggled with identity diffusion, as well. The symptoms and anxiety have lessened as I continue with my transition, and I find myself comparing my experiences to other experience a lot less frequently.
If it helps, you're original and authentic. It's impossible for you not to be yourself. Everything you do is authentic to yourself because you're doing it. Even if you're trying to model your behaviors on other people, it was you who chose those people based on your own unique experience.