this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2025
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What would you do if, against all odds, you were elected Pope? (hexbear.net)
submitted 4 days ago by HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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Aside from being the maoist pope, of course.

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[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 18 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Aside from being the maoist pope, of course.

the catholic uprising against the landlords was the largest and most comprehensive proletarian revolution in history, and led to almost totally-equal redistribution of land among the peasantry

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

but also:

  • have the archives digitised/remotely accessible, get a gun, and go church to church shooting pedos worldwide
  • call for the immediate, eternal dissoloution of the "state" of Italy
  • official church position that the great satan is actually the literal embodyment of satan, kicking off the holy crusade against amerikkka and all of its satellite/vassal states (additional bonus of retaking and liberating jerusalem and greater palestine)
  • canonise Fidel Castro (while going straight to Marx, Lenin or Stalin might be funnier eventually, inflicting otherwordly levels of psychic damage on gusanos has the best immediate payoff)
  • the papal treasury shall fund the alliance of sahel states indefinitely
[–] ClimateStalin@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago

canonise Fidel Castro (while going straight to Marx, Lenin or Stalin might be funnier eventually, inflicting otherwordly levels of psychic damage on gusanos has the best immediate payoff)

sicko-laser

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 5 points 3 days ago

Would be welcomed considering church was and sometimes still is biggest single landowner except state in most catholic countries in Europe.