Deep breaths my dear. remember you are a person even when you're on your own. Your identity and who you are shouldnt be shackled to another person thats not fair on either of you. Go get doing things that you like, things he wouldnt have liked, go be you or try to remember who that person is. Have a phenomenal cathartic cry and move forward, one step at a time. We love you. Everything will be alright.
this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2025
7 points (76.9% liked)
Off My Chest
1293 readers
73 users here now
RULES:
I am looking for mods!
1. The "good" part of our community means we are pro-empathy and anti-harassment. However, we don't intend to make this a "safe space" where everyone has to be a saint. Sh*t happens, and life is messy. That's why we get things off our chests.
2. Bigotry is not allowed. That includes racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and religiophobia. (If you want to vent about religion, that's fine; but religion is not inherently evil.)
3. Frustrated, venting, or angry posts are still welcome.
4. Posts and comments that bait, threaten, or incite harassment are not allowed.
5. If anyone offers mental, medical, or professional advice here, please remember to take it with a grain of salt. Seek out real professionals if needed.
6. Please put NSFW behind NSFW tags.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Thank you, he still wants to talk to me :)
You should talk to a therapist. This attachment isn't normal. It sounds like you're smothering him and he's about to leave.
Thanks, I will 😊
I feel like I need more info. He wants to take a break to help attachment, but you seem plenty attached? Maybe he's feeling smothered and wants some time away? You don't need to take a break from a relationship to ask for space.
He wanted to help with feeling less attached and needed more space, and we both were feeling mentally down a lot. My attachment + my mood swings.
Hey I'm sorry you're going through this. Read the book Attached.
Thank you 🙏
Plus, everything that reminds me of him will cause me to start sobbing.
For me it was fleeing the pain that caused such a constant high state of allertness, and restlessness, and in a self-fulfilling way: pain.
The solution for me was to sob, and cry, and feel it. All. 🤍
Don't need to open the floodgates, but don't pretend there isn't enormous pressure on the levies either. Release the pressure, at a comfortable rate.
Thank you. 🤍 Should I keep his picture on my phone wallpaper or remove it? Idk :(
If the picture a source of negative emotions? Maybe. Or is it a source of comfort? Only you can determine if seeing his picture frequently is helping or hindering you.
He still talks to me, thankfully. He says he doesn’t wanna break up, just take a mental health break
Watch bridget jones. Not a joke 😊. When I was on such a high state of alertness, it made it very difficult to recognize my own emotions.
Looking at how others do it, helped with self-reflection.
Put some beautiful flowers or sunset as background image. But more importantly: don't use the phone, for a while. Put it out of arms reach, in the next room. It's a bad kind of distraction.
And yes, I know this is all easy to say, but hard to do. Just think about the next step, not the whole plan. 🤍🌸🩷
Thank you so much!! Thank you so so so so much 🙏
I can’t think about hugging him or anything he said because thinking of him reminds me that I can’t talk to him.