this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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If we MUST eat a entire bag of Oreos.

Which scenario is better?

  • Eat the entire bag in 30 minutes
  • Eat the bag slowly, and evenly throughout a day?

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[–] toadjones79@lemm.ee 3 points 54 minutes ago (1 children)

Technically the entire bag all at once will raise blood sugar higher, causing a bigger spike. The liver can't deal with that much, so it converts the excess to fat faster than if it is spread out. The bigger problem is making it a habit of surprising your metabolism with huge calorie spikes with starvation in-between. One time isn't bad enough to be concerned with. Weekly, or even daily will wreck your liver (non alcoholic fatty liver disease or NAFLD is just a couple steps away from cirrhosis)

Also, I'm no doctor nor do I have any background in the medical field. I just have a more progressed version of NAFLD from eating things like Oreos with both hands for forty years.

[–] jet@hackertalks.com 1 points 36 minutes ago

That make alot of sense. I'm sorry you have NAFLD, is it getting better now?

[–] Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 5 points 2 hours ago

All else being equal, spread out so not to induce a sugar rush/diabetic shock.

[–] TempermentalAnomaly@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

One sleeve per bite. Take one sleeve in the morning and one in the evening. Call me in the morning.

[–] crozilla@lemmy.world 7 points 3 hours ago

Oreo’s have had all their flavor sucked out of them through enshitification—and to make you eat more to feel satisfied.

Go to any grocery store (like TJ’s) and just buy “Sandwich Cookies.” THEY taste like Oreos used to.

(But, you have to eat them fast as they degrade quickly like actual food, something Oreos isn’t.)

[–] DirigibleProtein@aussie.zone 2 points 2 hours ago

Put them in the other room so that you save some for later, and then keep going back at intervals for just one more, until suddenly there are none left.

[–] Adderbox76@lemmy.ca 18 points 5 hours ago

I've solved that problem by buying two bags. One to eat all at once. And one to spread out over the rest of the day.

[–] TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee -1 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

yeah i aint touching this question, eating disorders are a bitch and this is the kind of preoccupation that we gotta let go of

[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 16 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Eat em all at once. Right before your appointment at the dentist to have your teeth cleaned

[–] whodrankarnoldpalmer@startrek.website 4 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Immediately after the tuna salad sandwich. Heck, treat yourself to a big glass of milk with those cookies, too.

[–] AoxoMoxoA@lemmy.world 4 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Or a milk and onion smoothie

[–] MataVatnik@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

Not to judge you or anything but I'm judging you

[–] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 15 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

More enjoyment if you spread it out over the whole day, plus you won't barf. You might shit liquid, but y'know, lesser evil I'd say.

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 4 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

People barf from binge eating stuff? :o

[–] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, there's a finite amount of room in there, where else it is supposed to go?

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 2 points 5 hours ago

The second stomach ig? 👍

[–] ef9357@lemmy.world 13 points 17 hours ago

If you are intermittent fasting, then eat in one 30 minute window. If not, no fucking idea.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 7 points 17 hours ago

Scrape off all the cream and eat a bowlful of that, then snack on the burnt cookies the rest of the day.

[–] olafurp@lemmy.world 43 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Eating sugary stuff that sticks in your teeth continuously throughout the day is the worst possible you can do for the teeth.

Binge eating sweets is pretty bad for blood sugar.

So to balance it out eat a third after every meal for max health and enjoyment.

[–] Landless2029@lemmy.world 16 points 22 hours ago

So do a line after you dine?

[–] booly@sh.itjust.works 6 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

I love that the question doesn't specify what "better" means, and we're all interpreting it in our own ways. Healthier? More enjoyable?

[–] Lag@lemmy.world 2 points 12 hours ago

It's better for mother nature if we all try to eat a whole bag in 30 seconds.

[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 90 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The package is conveniently divided into breakfast, lunch, and dinner rows.

[–] vulgarcynic@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 day ago

We call that doing lines around these parts.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 5 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

I’d probably barf if I ate the whole pack in one sitting. Or at least feel like I would.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 17 hours ago

Can confirm, I felt like that once and it made me quit Oreos for a long while. I still don't quite enjoy them as much and do limit how many I eat. So I guess that's good?

[–] LittleTarsier@lemmy.ca 31 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (3 children)

As a Canadian, unfortunately the answer is now to not eat them at all because they are an American product. This breaks my heart because I am the type of person that would eat an entire bag throughout the day :(

[–] anas@lemmy.world 3 points 2 hours ago

This breaks my heart because I am the type of person that would eat an entire bag throughout the day :(

It gets easier, trust me. We’ve been boycotting American (and more) products over here for a while, I barely miss anything anymore.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 8 points 21 hours ago (3 children)

What about Canadian off-brand? Is that a thing? Like at Canadamart or Tim Horton's or wherever y'all shop?

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 7 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

technically it's an off off brand because Oreos themselves are an off brand

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 5 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

True, but Hydrox is also American, so no dice.

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 5 points 20 hours ago

darn :(, I tried

[–] LittleTarsier@lemmy.ca 3 points 19 hours ago

We have "Eat the Middle First" but they're not that great sadly

[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago

So Canada doesn't have decent cookies either?
I tried them once (in EU) to see what those famous cookies were like and they're crap.
Not even mediocre.

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[–] renrenPDX@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It depends on what you want your poop to look like later.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

oh i don't plan on pooping.

[–] lukstru@lemmy.world 6 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Do you just let it happen when the time comes?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 21 hours ago

I miss the spontaneity of my youth.

[–] gjoel@programming.dev 73 points 1 day ago (4 children)

A dentist once answered this question. Better to eat it at once than soak your teeth in sugar for the entire day. Even better if you brush your teeth after, of course.

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[–] eatham@aussie.zone 2 points 19 hours ago

Eat them all at once

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