this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2025
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If we MUST eat a entire bag of Oreos.

Which scenario is better?

  • Eat the entire bag in 30 minutes
  • Eat the bag slowly, and evenly throughout a day?

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[–] crozilla@lemmy.world 3 points 41 minutes ago

Oreo’s have had all their flavor sucked out of them through enshitification—and to make you eat more to feel satisfied.

Go to any grocery store (like TJ’s) and just buy “Sandwich Cookies.” THEY taste like Oreos used to.

(But, you have to eat them fast as they degrade quickly like actual food, something Oreos isn’t.)

[–] Adderbox76@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 hours ago

I've solved that problem by buying two bags. One to eat all at once. And one to spread out over the rest of the day.

[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 15 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Eat em all at once. Right before your appointment at the dentist to have your teeth cleaned

[–] whodrankarnoldpalmer@startrek.website 4 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Immediately after the tuna salad sandwich. Heck, treat yourself to a big glass of milk with those cookies, too.

[–] AoxoMoxoA@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

Or a milk and onion smoothie

[–] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 13 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

More enjoyment if you spread it out over the whole day, plus you won't barf. You might shit liquid, but y'know, lesser evil I'd say.

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

People barf from binge eating stuff? :o

[–] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 4 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, there's a finite amount of room in there, where else it is supposed to go?

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

The second stomach ig? 👍

[–] ef9357@lemmy.world 12 points 14 hours ago

If you are intermittent fasting, then eat in one 30 minute window. If not, no fucking idea.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 7 points 14 hours ago

Scrape off all the cream and eat a bowlful of that, then snack on the burnt cookies the rest of the day.

[–] booly@sh.itjust.works 6 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I love that the question doesn't specify what "better" means, and we're all interpreting it in our own ways. Healthier? More enjoyable?

[–] Lag@lemmy.world 2 points 9 hours ago

It's better for mother nature if we all try to eat a whole bag in 30 seconds.

[–] olafurp@lemmy.world 42 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Eating sugary stuff that sticks in your teeth continuously throughout the day is the worst possible you can do for the teeth.

Binge eating sweets is pretty bad for blood sugar.

So to balance it out eat a third after every meal for max health and enjoyment.

[–] Landless2029@lemmy.world 16 points 19 hours ago

So do a line after you dine?

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I’d probably barf if I ate the whole pack in one sitting. Or at least feel like I would.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 14 hours ago

Can confirm, I felt like that once and it made me quit Oreos for a long while. I still don't quite enjoy them as much and do limit how many I eat. So I guess that's good?

[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 88 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The package is conveniently divided into breakfast, lunch, and dinner rows.

[–] vulgarcynic@sh.itjust.works 24 points 1 day ago

We call that doing lines around these parts.

[–] LittleTarsier@lemmy.ca 30 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

As a Canadian, unfortunately the answer is now to not eat them at all because they are an American product. This breaks my heart because I am the type of person that would eat an entire bag throughout the day :(

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 8 points 18 hours ago (3 children)

What about Canadian off-brand? Is that a thing? Like at Canadamart or Tim Horton's or wherever y'all shop?

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 7 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

technically it's an off off brand because Oreos themselves are an off brand

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 5 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

True, but Hydrox is also American, so no dice.

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 5 points 17 hours ago

darn :(, I tried

[–] LittleTarsier@lemmy.ca 3 points 16 hours ago

We have "Eat the Middle First" but they're not that great sadly

[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 3 points 16 hours ago

So Canada doesn't have decent cookies either?
I tried them once (in EU) to see what those famous cookies were like and they're crap.
Not even mediocre.

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[–] renrenPDX@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

It depends on what you want your poop to look like later.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 15 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

oh i don't plan on pooping.

[–] lukstru@lemmy.world 6 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Do you just let it happen when the time comes?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 18 hours ago

I miss the spontaneity of my youth.

[–] eatham@aussie.zone 2 points 16 hours ago

Eat them all at once

[–] Solocore@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago

Probably across the course of the day parts maybe faster than others

[–] gjoel@programming.dev 72 points 1 day ago (4 children)

A dentist once answered this question. Better to eat it at once than soak your teeth in sugar for the entire day. Even better if you brush your teeth after, of course.

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