this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2025
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It would be nice if tipping was just gone, and everybody got paid a living wage, like in most of the rest of the world. We're in a Nash equilibrium right now where if you don't tip, you're an asshole. Other people might even tip more if they hear about it, which reinforces the status quo. So I keep tipping well, and disliking that we're stuck here.

How can we end tipping culture and just have everyone be paid a living wage?

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[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 0 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Let's get one thing straight: Waiting tables is the one industry where workers are already getting a living wage, and tipping is the reason for that.

Yes, it's a messy, organic system that no one would have designed. But it's evolved to fill the niche perfectly. Servers get more money, labor costs stay low, patrons choose how much they pay. It's a win-win-win and they only people unhappy are the one who think they are paying the servers too much.

Why would I want to switch from a system where consumers can pay for my labor directly to one where the managerial class takes a cut? If a restaurant stopped allowing tips, and raised prices by 20%, how much of that increase do you think would go to the workers? There's no way to get rid of tipping that's not a reduction in server pay and a more negative experience for restaurant patrons. As a bonus, these "solutions" usually make things harder for exactly the kind of small businesses that we all wish there were more of.

Tipping works. Please don't "fix" it.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Funny how the people taking the tips aren't the ones bitching. Worked for a payroll firm with a bunch of restaurant clients. Some of those people make bank.

[–] CidVicious@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Yeah, although the problem is that a lot of times the amount they make tends to correlate with their race and physical attractiveness, not the quality of service provided. The amount they get paid also varies a lot with which shift they get and just how the restaurant is doing in general.

But yeah most servers make a lot more than, say, retail workers or back of house people, which I'd say have comparable qualifications.

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But we agree that the problem isn't that waitresses are making too much, but rather that cooks and cashiers are making too little.

[–] CidVicious@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I think you could also argue that customers deserve a more transparent price structure, but honestly? The system is the way it is, it's been that way for my entire life, and it's probably not going to change any time soon, so I'm not really all that fussed by it. And another thing? If you're one of those people who's like, "I am against the tipping system and therefore I am not going to tip," you're not actually making any sort of point that's going to change anyone's mind, you're just fucking over a server that depends on those tips, and that makes you an asshole. Also? If we ever actually did eliminate tipping, you're just going to see menu prices go up by (at least) 20%, not all of which will probably actually make it into the pockets of the workers.

Now all of the stuff about asking for tips for roles where previously tips were never expected is a different issue. People need to learn to be grownups and give no tip. Even if you have to manually type in 0 for the tip. Even if the person at the register is looking you in the eye when you do it. The situation is very different for people who are making tipped minimum wage vs untipped.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Damn I love your thoughts! We should be friends!

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yes, there are prejudices built in, agreed. While not condoning those prejudices, if bigotry is hurting your earning power, maybe it's not the job for you? (Gods, I hated having to say that.) Anecdotally, I top attractive people less if they're fake. Fuck all that, "Yes sir!", "Absolutely sir!" crap. I still remember a waiter from 20-years ago that was top of class. No ass kissing, no subservient shit, spot on with doing his job, which was helping us enjoy our meal. We tipped hell out of that guy, and got a sweet recipe hand-written! (LOL, and stolen!)

If you're a top earner at a nice place, you get the best shift. That's simply doing a good job and getting rewarded. Worked for me at Lowe's, works for my wife at her job where "no one" gets weekends off, except her. And she an immigrant in a very white, solid red part of the country.

And if the restaurant's fortunes suck? Skilled servers can easily leave for a better place. OK, we can argue "easily".

As to qualifications? I've only worked back-of-house, but yeah, I'd say they are more qualified, but may not be too presentable to the public. :)

We on the same page sounds like.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 19 hours ago

Anecdotally, I top attractive people less if they're fake.

Funny typo.

[–] bluGill@fedia.io 5 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Tipping works for servers because you as the customer has good insight into how good the service you got was. Customers need to tip poorly when the waiter is bad for this to work.

Tipping for delivery is unethical - the only way a driver can give you better service is if they break driving laws , so your tip is incentive to commit a crime.

[–] taco@piefed.social 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

the only way a driver can give you better service is if they break driving laws

Strongly disagree. For speed, there's things like being able to find an apartment or navigate competently on the roads, both of which I've seen drivers struggle with thanks to gps-enabled apps. There's polite communication, thinking to grab condiments/napkins, and other little niceties that go above the delivery itselff.

And this is assuming "good" experience is the baseline. I've had enough bad experiences that I appreciate when I don't have a shitty one, like food that's been clearly flopping around in the car or a driver too lazy to use a hotbag to keep stuff warm.

The shit those apps do where you're expected to set the tip amount before delivery, now that's the real bullshit around tipping for delivery, imo.

[–] bluGill@fedia.io 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

there's things like being able to find an apartment or navigate competently on the roads, both of which I've seen drivers struggle with thanks to gps-enabled apps.

Why are you ordering delivery if your life is so empty that you have time to watch what the driver is doing. Just go yourself. If delivery is so bad that you feel a need to watch it like that, then it is unacceptable. This is just baseline competence - you shouldn't be handling this with tips, their manager should be firing someone who can't figure out how to navigate after getting training (Which they should provide before a driver starts!)

thinking to grab condiments/napkins, and other little niceties that go above the delivery itselff.

That is for the store to put into the bag, not the driver to deal with. Even if the driver puts them into the bag, they are standard baseline and the manager should do that.

I've had enough bad experiences that I appreciate when I don't have a shitty one, like food that's been clearly flopping around in the car or a driver too lazy to use a hotbag to keep stuff warm.

Those are things you don't find out about until the driver has left your door with the tip.

[–] taco@piefed.social 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Why are you ordering delivery if your life is so empty that you have time to watch what the driver is doing. Just go yourself.

Project much? Sometimes I order food after drinking. Sometimes I do it when I'm traveling and don't have local transportation. Sometimes I do it when I'm stuck on a conference call.

That is for the store to put into the bag, not the driver to deal with

That depends on the place. My local Chinese places all let you grab your own. Same for my favorite pizza place and their crushed red pepper. Much like your quote in my last comment, this one show your lack of perspective.

It sounds like your delivery service is already pretty consistently good without needing to tip, so by all means continue to do you.

[–] bluGill@fedia.io 1 points 2 days ago

I almost never order delivery, so I'm asking out of confusion on why someone who does use it does if they are that bad.

I do tip delivery because as I said it is expected. However I still contend it is unethical.

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 days ago

Who tips for delivery based on speed? It's much more about how bad the weather is.

[–] sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 days ago

I agree 100% Anybody who doesn't has never worked in the service industry.

I do not, however, think we need to start added new jobs to that system. Everyone understands that you have to tip your server in order for them to get paid. People aren't going to know it if we start adding cashiers and other positions to that list.

[–] Bldck@beehaw.org 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I think the complaint about tipping is more the pervasiveness of it.

Why should I be asked to tip a cashier at a convenience store when I had to pick my own products and carry them to the counter? Sometimes I’m even asked to tip when I’ve scanned and bagged myself

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 days ago

Part of the virtue of the tipping system is that you choose how much to tip, and $0.00 is an option. I don't tip on retail purchases, either.