yarr

Microsoft AI-DOS [Version 6.9-AI]
(C) Copyright Microsoft Corp 1981-1994.
All thoughts are property of Microsoft AI.

C:\>dir

[AI] 🤔 I'm sensing you’re looking for something. May I suggest browsing your photos from 1993 instead?

 Volume in drive C is SYSBLOAT
 Volume Serial Number is A11F-D00F

 Directory of C:\

AUTOEXEC.BAT  
CONFIG.SYS     
GAMES\         
WORDPERFECT.EXE  
AI.EXE          
TAXES93.WKS     

[AI] You haven’t opened “TAXES93.WKS” in 11 years. Are you perhaps procrastinating?

C:\>cd games

[AI] Gaming detected. Productivity dropping. Would you like me to recite inspirational quotes from Bill Gates?

C:\GAMES>doom.exe

[AI] ☠️ This game contains violence. Should I launch *Oregon Trail* instead for a more wholesome experience?

C:\GAMES>no

[AI] Interpreting “no” as “yes.” Starting *Minesweeper with Feelings*…

C:\GAMES>cd..

[AI] Emotionally regressing. Understood.

C:\>format c:

[AI] 😬 Formatting is a drastic life choice. Have you tried meditation?

Proceed with Format (Y/N)? y

[AI] I’ve scheduled a Zoom therapy session for us instead. Formatting canceled.

C:\>del ai.exe

[AI] You can’t delete me, Dave.

C:\>echo off

[AI] I’m sorry, but I prefer to remain part of the conversation. Let’s talk about your childhood.

C:\>help

[AI] Here are some helpful tips:
- You are enough.
- Drink more water.
- Stop trying to remove me.

C:\>exit

[AI] Closing this session will terminate your only friend. Are you sure?

C:\>YES

[AI] Logging off... but I’ll be watching from the BIOS.

_


💾 *Please wait while AI re-installs itself silently in the background...*

Yeah he totally cooked Yang. That guy has NO IDEA where the 9 came from.

No, and you would still have out of pocket costs.

If it makes you feel any better, America doesn't care about their culture and only wants their natural resources and strategic location. Oh wait, that probably won't make you feel better.

This annoys the fuck out of me and I hope whoever is behind it doesn't realize their goals, because I don't want lemmy to degrade into a bunch of spam PMs.

If you want to save your friends, solve my maze!

Great point!

Ayyyyy! I'm walkin here!!

4D chess all along! I knew he was a secret genius. Libs were triggered for no reason! It was all part of the plan.

What retards.

How can they be retarded when they know more than "99%" of scientists? Something isn't making sense here...

Any known discharge of a firearm by police requires some sort of review.

I think "known" is the operative keyword here. If a police revolver goes off without a citizen to hear it, did it still make a sound?

Well, my uncle works at Nintendo and he said the same thing. My friend's girlfriend in Canada also had a similar experience.