dutchkimble

What do you mean you're on the internet and not an American? Is this some kind of a prank?

How's your experience using it? Do you keep it always on? And does the phone seem too big?

"...in Taiwan, China"

This announcement changes everything! I'm gonna send them my money right now

Fucked up

Best I can do is a restored DeLorean that maxes out at 87

You're mistaken. They want to give the vodka to the glass.

Beards?

Ahh! The files are in the router!l

Queue jumping up and down like a monkey trying to rip apart my router in order to reach a website

What about the speed of the earth's rotation though, could that fuck up the stick holding?

Camera-less small phone with a keyboard and an IR blaster

Fly with my family and friends to Antarctica, buy a lot of booze and supplies, assuming no smart zombies and that patient zero wasn’t in Antarctica