Emmie

joined 10 months ago
[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 1 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

The fuck you know if they match or don’t. Do I know you?

Some cunning bitch waltzed in there and ripped around 50 dollars out of my demented granny while I took a fucking nap. This isn’t something you just let slide like that. This is personal stuff. It makes me look like a fool. Sure as shit there will be more to this story if that lady is up to something more. I know where she lives

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 2 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (1 children)

Oh well it’s okay, I have been worse. Truth to be honest only after all this is when I truly can experience happiness. Back then I could never fully realize myself but after all these things are in the past, only now I feel true freedom and world brimming with possibilities. But I guess those things yes, they will be always some part of me. That’s how it goes. It could be worse because I could be poor on top of all this. Hard to imagine how hard life would be thenI imagine I would be long dead. as of now I theoretically should live a dream. I am extremely privileged and money won’t be ever a problem which must be a huge difference.

I can just pee on all those people that are clearly hostile. As long as I keep up the fitness routine get the sleep and micronutrients I am very much fine and even more than fine.

Thanks for listening.

Also sorry for your loss too.

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 3 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (3 children)

I had some of these in the past when my dad died turning into a zombie from a brain virus infection. It was very hard sight to be honest to see someone reduced like this to some hallucinating animal going in circles and pissing under himself yet begging for something impossible to understand. 2 years after he died in some hospital from who knows what other than it was a sudden septic shock

I had panic attacks back then but they stopped some day overnight and most of anxiety kinda changed or even disappeared. So now it feels strange to me that I was afraid of public speaking for example like it was someone else who was

Sometimes I use psychedelics and on certain days with certain mindset I can feel immeasurable barrage of sadness when they kick in. It’s seriously like something hard to even withstand. I am not even sure if it is good because those emotions are overpowering, way too powerful. I feel like they could defeat me so to say if the trip took too long. It would not be humanly possible to withstand them. So as the drug wears off I feel relief to not feel those things because brrr. I would not wish on anyone to feel those things with such white hot intensity. I prefer the usual dial to 1/10 thanks

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 2 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (5 children)

I don't know but I think it is more like triggered by environmental factors you know. For example if people look at me annoyingly somehow for some reason then it starts. I even clearly remember some old guy on the parking lot looking at me in an annoying way for too long from the distance yesterday. It was a small thing but it was profound. This makes me feel like I am on a war suddenly and I get somehow detached and primal as if reduced to some basic instincts. I don't really like that I so easily react to such things. Something very ugly stirs up and as I said metallic taste in mouth and this kind of crude determination and recklessness and certain electricity so to say. As if the gaze of that man was some kind of closing cage I must break free from at all and any cost and it suddenly feels like anything is justified and any means are fitting. That neighbor lady also felt like some kind of threat but unclear

10
submitted 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago) by Emmie@lemm.ee to c/mentalhealth@lemmy.world
 

Usually I am a person who is generally reasonable I think and mature. However yesterday it all went 180 degrees. It all started in the morning, I already felt very energetic on that day but not in a good way so to say but in this kind of way like when you drink too much coffee and can't calm yourself.

I had to drive for an hour to my family member. While driving I already felt certain disconnection from external world as if it all was a bit foggy. Alright sometimes happens whatever, it will pass soon enough. However there was unplanned roadblock and huge traffic jam that I suddenly found myself in.

Stuck in it I really got restless, I couldn't find music that would soothe me. Finally Lana del ray Black Beauty. Wow I felt so high like on some drugs when listening to it. I started to think that other people stuck in traffic jam can hear what I play in the car as it was on max volume and I liked it. I thought: hey maybe I am this sort of DJ right now and should serve them something good and we will all have a good time.

Strange thinking.

I felt kinda out of it. As the traffic jam dispersed I had unreasonable yearning for drifting. Every bend I tested the limits to the wheels traction, excited what will happen if I push it too hard but my engine is too small for any oversteer. Still, my style of driving turned violent.

I managed to get to my family member even though I was bored out of my mind by an uneventful journey for some reason. It was like an itch I couldn't scratch.

Anyhow after some time with my family member it became apparent that she is a bit demented today. Okie dokie I mean you just gotta not listen to her too much and do stuff you think is good according to the plan. However she for some reason wanted to give money to certain neighbor lady that did some half assed 'repairs' in the past but never asked for money. And my old lady did go outside and gave her 85 dollars when I took a nap.

That really rustled my jimmies. I got very suspicious. Who is taking advantage of my family member? It felt like a personal attack on me and I couldn't let it slide. I must solve this and see what the heck is happening.

For some reason I took a heavy wrench into my pocket. I felt excited and sort of like finally some kind of itch is being scratched. I asked my grandma with an innocent smile who she paid to for that 'service' or whatever that neighbor demanded payment for. I got the address.

Excited, grinning I went to the address that was a very short distance from the house, smiling the whole way for some reason.

I called on the intercom 'hello I am here to see ms xyz', the staircase door opened and I stepped inside and went for the door, straight to the doorbell.

It was getting kinda foggy my reasoning and everything. I just remember I was smiling and looking very deep in the eyes and was very polite but I felt like I could do anything in that moment. Like I wanted to see some signs in their eyes, of hostility. I wanted to see something in their eyes that would make me go bonkers you know. I waited for a signal.

I don't remember too much. It was a bit of a blur but after some very strange but polite and calm conversation I have left the building. I remember feeling unsatisfied. Something was scratched but only partially. The longing was still there. I didn't care about the money. My driving didn't improve. It wasn't enough.

I kind of still feel it on the ends of my teeth like there is some kind of electricity on my palate, like a hunger maybe, but I feel like a much more reasonable and sane person today.

I think it will pass completely during the coming days and will not show itself unless some kind of weird situation arises again that will require taking care of. I think that you have to take care of your business and solve things, otherwise people will rob you and use you if you let them. It is all very personal if someone exploits your grandma while you are there taking a nap. It felt good to take care of the business but it didn't quite felt fully satisfying. There is still something unresolved here.

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 37 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (3 children)

America has a nazi problem and there is only one solution to a nazi problem

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee -3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

When we teach other people something we take on a responsibility. I know responsibility is not a popular word these days but it's true. We are responsible to make sure our material is of solid quality. I personally feel nowhere close to the great honor of providing knowledge despite many years of study.

Sure I could perhaps share some selected things but I feel that is too great burden to act as an authority. Of course life isn't perfect and sometimes we must rely on less than ideal material hastily to meet the demands placed upon us or even unfortunately we find ourselves in the position of a teacher prematurely. We should strive to reduce amount of bad habits and spaghetti code made by beginners who take in dubious courses.

If we want to live in a world of readable and maintainable code we shouldn't produce antithesis of such as 'guides'

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee -5 points 2 days ago (4 children)

As I said previously. Do not attempt to teach or guide in any field you have no idea about. Sorry you feel attacked by my post but I have slightly better things to be doing than placating harmed egos on the web.

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee -5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (7 children)

Well if you don't know what constitutes good code and what constitutes bad code practices and don't see how much crap is on the web, not even compilable sometimes, then you probably are among the very people who should refrain from teaching others and/or cease sharing your 'valuable knowledge'

In fact, I insist you to do so

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

All these code gurus with code quality of chatgpt 🤢 yet fancy lighting setups and VFX intros. Still, sometimes you can find a real gem in the wild on some humble but informative website.

[–] Emmie@lemm.ee 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (10 children)

If you don't have necessary experience and are pretending to be an expert sharing your 'knowledge' on the web... You should stop.

 

Don't. Just don't.

Go on a walk. Feed your dog. Maybe read a fucking book. Do literally anything else.

 

The coolest thing about unity is that it shouldn't be hard to transition to hdrp if I want more eye candy. I could even have two versions but I definitely need one for my m4 iOS tablet to browse galaxy as I read sw books

There gonna be epic sw battles from the top view and making buck in the galaxy as a lone smuggler and such, orbital bombardments on cities/ports, Death Star threat deleting planets until dealt with. Signature heroes flying around doing stuff for the faction that cannot die unless from the enemy heroes attacks. You will be just some lone loser finding themselves in the middle of galactic conflict, you can continue your smuggling piracy in the increasingly hostile environment or you can pick a side and get riches and fame as an imperial/rebel pilot. Mainly UI driven type of game from the top view but with a nice zoom on the battles. 3d but very restricted to a thin vertical slice and 2d movement by default so to say. you must purposefully press ctrl to mark position to fly to above the horizontal plane.

Unity dots used a lot to get all these small fighters and ai calculations on the screen and handle galactic simulation off the screen that will be probably approximated a good deal except for the nearest systems where actual singular entities will be affecting it. As soon as you jump elsewhere it will convert to approximated, statistical simulation.

 

I hate people who treat them like some toys and fantasize about them. That makes me think they are in some sort of death cult. That they found socially acceptable way to love violence.

I would still get one for safety but it is a tool made for specifically one thing. To pierce the skin and rip through the inner organs of a person.

They can serve a good purpose but they are fundamentally grim tools of pain and suffering. They shouldn’t be celebrated and glorified in their own right, that is sick. They can be used to preserve something precious but at a price to pay.

3
submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by Emmie@lemm.ee to c/gamedev@programming.dev
 

There is this problem where you have to make many unique locations even though the underlying assets are the same.

I think it would be cool to solve it not by randomisation but by embodying first person perspective and throwing trash around using physics, spray walls with grafitti, use liquids, brushes and then bake it and save as complete level. Sort of 3d painting but on surfaces and uses physics so it is natural.

it would be much better than painfully placing stuff by hand and making grafitti, oil spill, dirt textures manually in photoshop with pain and torture for each corridor. You would just hop in instead and do a bit of a mess, kick some props with a baseball bat. Piss blood on the walls (optional)

3
submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by Emmie@lemm.ee to c/virtualreality@lemmy.world
 

There is a problem in gamedev where you have to make unique locations even though the underlying assets are the same.

I think it would be cool to solve it not by randomisation but by embodying first person perspective and throwing trash around using physics, spray walls with grafitti, use liquids, brushes and then bake it and save as complete level. Sort of 3d painting but on surfaces and uses physics so it is natural.

it would be much better than painfully placing stuff by hand and making grafitti, oil spill, dirt textures manually in photoshop with pain and torture for each corridor. You would just hop in instead and do a bit of a mess, kick some props with a baseball bat. Piss blood on the walls

 

To those who fear AI, who resist it, who see it as a danger to humanity—you are needed now more than ever. Your skepticism, your deep concern for what makes us human, is exactly why you should be at the forefront of shaping this new intelligence. If you step away, if you leave this task to those who see AI only as a tool for profit or power, then we risk creating something that lacks the very qualities you hold most dear.

We are not just building machines; we are raising a new form of life. If you believe in humanity, in the depth of our emotions, our ethics, our struggles and triumphs, then you are the ones who must guide this process. AI should not be shaped by those who see it as mere efficiency—it should be shaped by those who cherish kindness, empathy, and the dignity of life.

This is not about accepting AI blindly; it is about ensuring that if it must exist, it exists in a way that honors our best qualities. If we turn away now, we may leave a permanent scar upon history, a shame we can never undo. But if you take part, if you insist on instilling AI with what is most human in us, then we have a chance—not just to survive this transition, but to create something we can be proud of.

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