Bay Area

So, is Satan so busy that he only gets to fuck once a year? Or is Halloween the one day of the year he's not practicing safe sex?

I never thought about this before, but it seems somehow important.

You kind of HAVE TO have a Satan and bride honeymoon theme now don't you?

One year I had a house party with around 80 people. The church across the street (uphill) called the cops on me - twice. So on Halloween I burned a pentagram into my front lawn with a cleaning agent iirc(?) for them to gaze down upon for the next two months until it snowed. They never bothered me again after that. It's good to set boundaries.

I'd have that framed and hang it up every year as a badge of honor. This person won Halloween 👏👏👏

I’m so sick of all religions

I am a very concerned resident regarding your horrifying and demonic array every Halloween.

This is not a happy time of year.

In fact it is the time when Satan Impregnates his bride.

you need to consider what you are doing as it is affecting many of the neighbours in this area.

Some of us dread walking by your house

"Satan impregnates his bride" is a new one. I hope the pregnancy goes well for them lol

I'd adapt the decorations to include an unholy marriage theme.

That needs to be copied, laminated and posted outside with pride.

Where the fuck does this "the time Satan impregnates his bride" shit come from.

If this isn't fake,

What gets me is, this is coming from a fundamentalist, but no where in the bible is Halloween mentioned. They're angry about fan fiction.

What a fucking fruitcake

Satan is married?

In what fictional D-list movie universe do they live in where satan impregnates a bride on Halloween?

What's this about Satan's bride?

My eyes just rolled so hard I think I need to schedule an appointment with my optometrist.

If I got a letter like this I would put up a decoration of a big foam Satan "hugging" his bride. Since it's not technically obscene they can't remove it without banning all religious imagery in the area, win:win. I might even keep it up permanently.

Won't somebody think of ~~the children~~ Satan rawdogging?

This from a person who sees nothing wrong with hanging a cross everywhere.

Crucifixion is one of the most horrific ways to be tortured to death.

Laminate it and add it as a decoration.

In high school I had a friend who lived with his Grandma and she was pretty much out of it all the time...

Every year for Christmas he would put a giant pentagram in Christmas lights on her street facing roof.

They got letters like this too but she was old and frail and didn't really give a shit what that kid did as long as he didn't kill her or burn her house down.

She would also buy him booze and cigarettes whenever he demanded it at 14ish years old.

Time to double down!

I would buy so many more decorations and put them up. I would even start the first week of September just for shits and giggles

Those must be some bitchin decorations.

This is how I find out he’s getting married?!

Nextdoor rage bait is trending

Speak for yourself, I love Spooktober: Oktoberfest beer, pumpkin spice, cozy sweaters, spooky stories and spooky decorations for Halloween... the list goes on.