Thanks everyone, I went with debian 13. So far so good
this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2025
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Is there one distro that can do all these?
Yes, basically all of them.
Asking open-ended distro questions means you're just going to get a list of people's personal preferences stated as "facts".
Any distro would do, but for server Debian is always the most recommended and used
Try a couple, Debian 12, Fedora server etc.
I recommend Debain, or else Linux Mint which is a derivative of (and fully compatible with Debian Linux) but has more recent software packages available to it.
Both Tailscale and Jellyfin have instructions on how to install onto Debian which are not too difficult to follow.
If you intend to use this computer as a server, Debian is probably better, it is lighter-weight and slightly more stable. If you intend to also use this computer as a daily driver, you might try Linux Mint instead, since it includes more of Ubuntu's more recent software builds in their app store (i.e. package repository), and it is helpful to have more recent builds of the most popular apps. I have heard it is also a bit easier to install games onto Linux Mint than Debian.
I have a blog post about how to pick a Linux written for people switching from Windows or Mac, if you are interested in a more detailed explanation.
I'll second mint.
I'd take a look at universal blue; Bazzite, Aurora or Bluefin. I use Bluefin and tailscale is built in (you just have to login to your setup). They're atomic so they upgrade the whole image automatically (no faffing or bugging you) and apps are all flatpak. I get on great with it. Only caveat is it only supports relatively modern nvidia graphics cards. https://universal-blue.org/
Your mate is running a Jellyfin client on Unraid? Or the server? Unraid is a NAS that can run VMs and containers. It is not a desktop system.
If you were only running server stuff on that machine, I would recommend Proxmox.
As others have said though, basically any Linux distro can do what you are looking for.
If you are going to run it as a desktop, pick a distro that has a desktop environment (GUI) that you like and go from there.
Fun fact: Unraid is really just Slackware Linux running the Unraid application on top
For your mentioned use cases, any distribution would do.
In fact, any answer for your question would be anecdotal, and here’s mine: Debian if this isn’t your first rodeo, and Ubuntu Server if it is.
Heck, just play around with Ubuntu Server and then go to Debian.
Moreover, you may ask this question on !selfhosted@lemmy.world for better insights.
Fedora Server is the one I use.