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It's with a heavy heart that I inherit an administration that oversaw the invasion of Afghanistan and the illegal torture of detainees in our facilities at Guantanamo Bay...
...which is why I'm pleased to announce we will be occupying Afghanistan and operating the torture facility the right way this time!
don't mind me, just signing off on a P.A.T.R.I.O.T. Act renewal, it's very important this continues now that the Smart Reasonable Adults are in charge and that's how it's gonna be forever moving forward
It’s terrible, but I’m glad to know I’m not crazy