this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2024
233 points (97.9% liked)

CustardFist

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Would you have the heart to tell her this is just a helper reaper? 🙄

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[–] Malgas@beehaw.org 19 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] CustardFist 9 points 7 months ago

I love Terry Pratchett.

[–] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 11 points 7 months ago

This reminds me of a piece of warhammer fantasy lore. In the empire part of the coming of age ceremony is to be "doomed". You go to the temple of the God of death and one of his priests comes up with how you are going to die. You don't get to choose though.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Mall Reapers should be a thing that you see on Dia De La Muertes.

[–] CustardFist 3 points 7 months ago

Yessss. That would be great! 🙌

[–] brygphilomena@lemmy.world 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] whotookkarl@lemmy.world 10 points 7 months ago

You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!'

IT'S A SWORD, said the Hogfather. THEY'RE NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.

'She's a child!' shouted Crumley.

IT'S EDUCATIONAL.

'What if she cuts herself?'

THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.

  • Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
[–] halykthered@lemmy.ml 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Better than dying at the end of a long shift at work.

[–] CustardFist 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Also better than dying at the end of a long shit at work. 😜

[–] halykthered@lemmy.ml 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

True, but if that's the case, at least you died while helping yourself at the expense of the establishment.

[–] CustardFist 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Man, I hope I used a whole bunch of toilet paper before my heart stops. 😆

[–] halykthered@lemmy.ml 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

C. Fist

Drowned from an overflowing toilet.

1928-2024

[–] CustardFist 2 points 7 months ago

Drowned from an overflowing toilet.

Head first

[–] Pronell@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago

Poor kid.

Thinks she's living the dream... and ends up a quadriplegic.

[–] IMNOTCRAZYINSTITUTION@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

bends his scythe blade hey everyone this reaper's a phony!

[–] CustardFist 2 points 7 months ago

“YEAH! HE ISN’T HARVESTING OUR SOULS, HE’S JUST A SKELETON, MEMORIZING CHILDREN’S DEATH WISHES. GET HIM!”