I probably won't answer many comments. I'm also not gonna make what I say sound more pretty... Sorry.
I've seen the memes like "trans people have a hell beam that came with HRT" come up more and more often. We do. It's called pepper spray. Please learn from my mistakes and get one before you regret not having one. Carry it with you daily, in a pocket where it is easy to reach, ideally with your dominant hand. It's not a problem for us tomboy- ish cargo pants lovers, but if you are cursed with female pockets, get one you can clip into a pocket or your waistband. If you tuck your shirt in too then consider buying a pepper gun like a guardian angel that you can carry inside the waistband. And I can't stress this enough, you won't be able to find your pepper spray fast enough if you just throw it into a purse.
Regardless if it's someone getting really aggravated at you being trans or if someone starts to masturbate while looking at you on public transport and following you through the train when you get up and leave, regardless if you use it or not. Even just having it as a backup is extremely important.
I didn't bring those examples up for nothing, both things, and even worse, happen (happened to me, friends and family too, trans and cis) and we are just as vulnerable - if not more - than most other people. The only way we can protect ourselves against a guy twice our strength and weight is by playing unfair. If you need to, use pepper spray. If they have you restrained, bite, poke in their eyes, and the first chance you have, run. Speaking of which, learn how to run fast for a short period of time. If you already do running from time and time again, do a sprint at the end of your session.
If you want to learn actually stuff about self defense, I personally can recommend getting some Krav Maga courses. It's a fighting technique that focuses on getting the fuck out of a situation. I sadly don't have the money for it anymore but I will pick it back up.
This world can be cruel and that comes from someone who lives in one of the safest areas in the world. The point of all of this isn't to make you scared of everyone and everything. I'm saying this because I want you to be able to stand tall and proud despite everything because if worst comes to worst, you know how to fend for yourself.
If you have any more useful information on self defense, please comment them.
Stay safe out there <3
I'm sorry you have to deal with such things for no reason. ๐
I hadn't heard about the pepper gun before, and that looks like a great idea to have something you can carry and use in a consistent manner every day. As you said, finding something in your bag is difficult or pulling something smaller out of a pocket which may be facing any which direction, including at yourself, and it will be even trickier in the heat of the moment.
I've always heard you should buy at least one extra so you can test it and familiarize yourself with it. Different brands and designs spray different distances, and in different patterns and will be affected by wind differently, especially considering sprays vs gels. It would probably also be wise to learn how to treat yourself in case you receive any blowback from it or catch a friend or bystander.
I heard recently on a podcast about protests that different sprays and contact lenses can be a serious danger, and they advised to wear glasses if they think you may be exposed, so that may be another thing to consider if you're choosing pepper spray as your defensive tool.
As always, do your own research and determine what you feel comfortable with, you want something you know you can count on to work and that you will be able to use safely should the need arise!
Stay safe and be proud of yourself for who you are. You aren't responsible for other people's behavior, just be mindful of your surroundings and trust your instincts if you feel a situation is bad. โค๏ธ