Autism

yesterday i went to a concert of a friend of mine, then with some friends we went to his house for an afterparty. I had probably one of the most fun nights in my life (also bc we were all kinda ND). Then I went home, and all of it came crashing down: i was back in the place where i feel unwelcome, where im forced to live with my parents, who i came to hate throughout my life bc of how they give conditional love, have had many outbursts against me, fueled my meltdowns and punished me for them. Some days ago they found some weed in my room and my mom literally started talking to me as if i wasnt human, calling me a junkie and stuff. They never listen to me, when i talk about my feelings they always manage to either give useless advice or turn it personal and start a fight. For instance I've completely lost interest in uni bc they kept pushing me on the topic when i had major difficulties with it, and I'm considering dropping out bc i can't take it anymore. I can't move out bc I'm broke, if i don't finish uni I'll never be able to sustain myself outside of this fascist shithole called Italy, and i can't handle a job, let alone with uni. I feel trapped, and all i want to do is hibernate myself and forget about this world. I feel like I'm a mistake on this planet