this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2025
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politics

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Cory Booker has been filibustering for a while, but there's no legislation that he's stalling.

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[–] mathemachristian@hexbear.net 41 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)

His aides set up a bucket in the cloakroom so he could keep a foot on the Senate floor if he needed to relieve himself.

this is the kind of pointless rituals that you read about in stories of weird kings courts. "Nooo my foot hasnt crossed this line yet, so I can continue talking and while I am talking this law thats gonna affect over 100 million people cannot get voted on and if I am annoying enough the opposition is going to drop it!!" - a very serious legislative body

If there isnt even a law being filibustered I guess it's finally crossed the threshold into simulacrum

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 32 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It is however precedent. If hexbear helps me get elected to the senate, I pledge to shit in a bucket on the floor every day. I will put John Fetterman to shame.

[–] mathemachristian@hexbear.net 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

you'll need a massive bucket and a very strict diet

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 17 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

String cheese and malt liquor. Nothing else for my entire term.

edit: Actually the US Senate cafeteria menu isn't bad. I'll do that for lunch but otherwise only consume string cheese and malt liquor.

[–] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Finally an honest politician who stands by his campaign promises

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 8 points 1 day ago

I didn't say I'll be an honest politician, just one who shits in a bucket and makes the rest of the senate endure that every time it's in session. Otherwise I'll be a very corrupt politician.

[–] OldSoulHippie@hexbear.net 14 points 1 day ago

Imagine thirty or so glassy eyed old fucks looking in the direction of your foot while you rock one in the closet.

[–] WizardOfLoneliness@hexbear.net 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Don't forget that he's actively pissing when using the bucket

[–] mathemachristian@hexbear.net 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

The chamber bucket was attended to by his knaves so milord could keep his rousing speech going without removing his foot from the deliberation floor, thus securing the blockage of the law by tiring out the lords who had put it forth. The realm was safe once more.