Whenever someone brings up Lana and Lilly Wachowski's body of work, The Matrix is always at the center of the conversation. Maybe Speed Racer and Cloud Atlas get some mentions thanks to their vocal followers, but their spacefaring epic Jupiter Ascending is typically swept under the rug. A critical and financial disaster, most people wouldn't blame you for forgetting about it. And that's a shame because we believe there are enough reasons after 10 years to give it a rewatch with new eyes.
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Millennia-spanning human dynasties that harvest planets to make their lives longer, a human whose genes were spliced with a space wolf's, reincarnation backed by hokey, half-explained science... Jupiter Ascending isn't an easy sell, but behind the weak story is some excellent world-building, and it's exactly the sort of 'bad movie' that's worth revisiting.
Jupiter Ascending spends far too much time yapping about market disputes and profits while failing to present a compelling narrative built around it. The story orbits around Jupiter Jones (Mila Kunis), who was named by her astronomer father after the famous gas giant. Her dull, aimless life in Chicago as a cleaner who's stuck with her relatives is the opposite of special though.
Despite the classic Cinderella setup and colorful sci-fi universe, the Wachowskis' script is smothered by half-baked exposition and infighting, centered around the highly profitable business of 'harvesting' developed worlds for 'youth serum' the extraterrestrial elites use to live for thousands of years.
Add overblown family matters that come and go (at least two major villains are entirely dropped and never brought up again) to the mix and you've got a muddled mess of a plot.
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Despite its shortcomings, you can't deny that Jupiter Ascending continues to be a gorgeous movie. The CGI work has its ups and downs, sure, but the Wachowskis traditionally excel at making fantasy come to life and this is no exception. Many would even argue the 'overly digital' look of their post-Matrix movies is a feature and not a bug. Their works, no matter the setting, could be considered the opposite of grounded, with high saturation and vibrant lighting working well in tandem with the exuberant sets, costumes, and shiny spaceships of their space opera to create an ethereal, dreamlike world. If you're looking for tangible realism in Jupiter Ascending, you're watching it wrong.
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To the surprise of no one, unmistakable big-name composer Michael Giacchino gave this space odyssey his all. The original soundtrack isn't just a good accompaniment; it almost sells the entire thing on its own. It's playful, classical, and even menacing when it needs to feel weighty. After giving the equally divisive John Carter at Disney a good push in 2012, his expertise yielded similar results here. It's an enchanting score that deserves a much better movie behind it.
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So, were we wrong about Jupiter Ascending? That's for each casual viewer, cinephile, and critic to decide. It has some remarkable positives and a passionate vision, that's for sure. But getting through its rougher patches and ignoring the misguided decisions remains challenging.
Perhaps time will be kind to Jupiter Ascending as we're bombarded with far duller franchise flicks and uninspiring hogwash, but it's still too soon to start with the 'Jupiter Ascending was great, actually' posts.
this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2025
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Mila Kunis is absolutely gorgeous in this movie. It's worth a watch just for her.
Valerian was the same. Watch it for Cara Delinvigne if for no other reason.
Both the leads in Valerian were complete charisma voids with no chemistry.
It could’ve launched a massive franchise
With Valerian I'd say you should watch the intro. Then turn it off. Unless you feel like watching some half-baked sci-fi eye-candy. The intro sequence with humanity's first contact and everything was beautiful and made me sniffly. The rest of the movie was pretty, kinda fun, but ultimately nowhere near as amazing as the intro.
The power armor scene was pretty good.
And then it ended too soon.
I had such high hopes from that intro
Same. Like, it honestly wasn't terrible, it was still fun and I still enjoyed it. It just wasn't as amazing as the intro.
Cara Delinvigne is gorgeous. I'd watch it just for her. The movie was just silly fluff.
the valerian cartoon was so good. The movie such a disapointment.
Have you tried watching it with the sound turned off?
No, but im not sure that would help. Valerian himself seems just so young and douche as opposed to a bit more of a mature scoundrel. Its like could you imagine whoever that actor was at that time playing han solo.
I agree, I grew up with europe comics, but valerian the movie totally failed to capture the essence of it. I mean I like mila kunis but she’s nowhere near capturing the mood, neither is valerian