Funny

Because they’re shellfish!

The young clerk's responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every day. Each morning the judge was enraged that the coffee cup arrived two-thirds full. The clerk explained that he had to rush to get the coffee delivered while it was still hot, which caused him to spill much of it along the way.

None of the judge's yelling and insults produced a full cup of coffee, until he finally threatened to cut the clerk's pay by one-third if he continued to produce one-third less than the judge wanted. The next morning he was greeted with a cup of coffee that was full to the brim, and the next morning and the morning after that.

The judge cOuldn resist gloating over his success and smugly complimented the clerk on his new technique. "Oh, there's not much to it," admitted the clerk happily, "I take some coffee in my mouth right outside the coffee room, and spit it back in when I get outside your office."

In case he got a hole in one!

Sneakers!

To talk to the other side!

Because it ran out of juice!

Because he wanted to catch some high fish!

A pouch potato!

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels!

He wanted to keep an eye on the mouse!

Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.

Climb a tree and act like a nut!

Because it heard it was a-peeling!

Nice belt!

Because you can see right through them!

Because he had the best beats!

Because it felt crumby!

Join the club.

A Popsicle.

Then it just clicked.

They get chilled to the bone!

He wouldn’t stop horsing around!

Satan went to check on them and saw that they had their shirts off and didn't mind the heat, so he turned up the heat. He went to check on them again and he saw that they were in their boxers and they still didn't mind the heat. Satan went and turned the temperature down to minus twenty.

Satan went to check on them and he saw that they were in their coats cheering. He went up to them and asked why they were cheering. One of them yelled out "Hell froze over, the Hurricanes must have won the cup!"

Because it had too many problems!

He was outstanding in his field!