Funny

Because they are shellfish!

They're afraid of the mouse!

Because he knew how to make the cut!

To talk to the other side!

Bison!

He couldn’t see himself doing it!

Because they hang out in bunches!

To cover their butt quacks!

Re-morse code!

Because all the fans left!

Because he heard the competition was stiff!

They just don’t have the stomach for it!

Sofishticated!

Because their horns don't work!

Because he was outstanding in his field!

Because they're always up to something!

Because you can see right through them!

He knew all the short cuts!

Because then it would be a foot!

Because they make up everything!

"Really? Where is Monosyllabia?". Thinking that he was just kidding, I played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, "Oh, you mean over by Croatia?"

She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

Ibn the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, "when did you bag him?" The host said, "that was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife." "What's he stuffed with," asked the visiting hunter. "My wife."

The waiter says, "I am sorry but we can't serve strings here."The string goes home, ties himself in a knot, and messes up his hair. He goes back to the bar about an hour later, sits down and says, "Waiter, give me a beer." The waiter says,"Hey aren't you the string who came in here earlier."The string replies, "No, I'm a fraid knot."