this post was submitted on 19 Jul 2025
24 points (96.2% liked)
ADHD
11604 readers
77 users here now
A casual community for people with ADHD
Values:
Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.
Rules:
- No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
- No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
- Do not request for donations.
- Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
- Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
- Mark NSFW content accordingly.
- No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
- Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
- Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
- Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).
Encouraged:
- Funny memes.
- Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
- Questions on confusing situations.
- Seeking and sharing support.
- Engagement in our values.
Relevant Lemmy communities:
lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I mean there is he dialectic. I have had arguments were as the person restates their meaning it sorta seems like we are saying the same thing but there is some nuance on language that we seem to be hung up on. Like it seems the idea is the same but we just can't rely on the appropriate language to express it. Its hard to describe because it only happens once in awhile and I will sometimes be like. You know we are sorta saying the same thing but oftentimes the person just gets more annoyed and will sorta double down on the language and usually I just give up at that point.
in this case we WERE disagreeing. but basically I was right so the other person changed their position. which is what I wanted, except then they immediately forget that they held the opposing position but we are still in an argument when that happens so it must be my fault for starting the argument over nothing.
You changed their mind. You won.
Wasn't that the point of the argument, or was the point for someone to shower you with congratulations?
Take the victory. You know what happened, and if the other person doesn't want to acknowledge it, you can't control that, so just remember what kind of person they are and move on.
I know. but by that time everybody already feels bad and it's my fault because I raised the initial disagreement which now never existed in the first place. So I just stirred up the whole situation out of nothing apparently.
Since the actual issue is resolved, but everything is still escalated, then we just transition to arguing about who said what. Which is tiresome and pointless. And I am accused of lying when I am not. I don't like that and it's very difficult for me to deescalate.
I understand completely. I'm the same way. Just gotta let that shit go. It's only as important as you want it to be.